Planning my demise
Everyone seems to be remarkably blasé about the fact that the world is to end in a couple of weeks?
Is everyone aware but just hoping that by ignoring the impending doom that it will somehow go away?
Or has everyone just forgotten?
It is a little problem that has been nagging at me for a while now â how does one prepare for Armageddon? Itâs not exactly an event that requires me to lay in vast stocks of baked beans and tobacco. There is no point in heading down to the bunker. There isnât even any need to book a plot in the cemetery, as presumably the cemetery will cease to exist too?
I know the end is going to happen on the 21st, but that raises another problem. As we discovered at the Millennium thing, a date sort of sweeps across the Earth like some kind of invisible tsunami, so I have to assume the The End will arrive in the same way? Are we going to see live pictures of Sydney vanishing, followed by a succession of cities as Dawn spreads across whatâs left of the world?
And what time of day will it happen? The Mayans never mention that. Will it happen at Noon? If so, then the 21st will truly be a Day of Morning?
I havenât decided what I am going to do. After all, I still have a fortnight left to decide.
I have a couple of bottles of excellent whiskey I have been keeping for a special occasion. I think we can class the End of The World as a special occasion? Leastwise, it strikes me as an event that isnât likely to happen a second time. So I will probably open them on the evening of the 20th and slowly sup them while I await the arrival of the Four Horsemen.
I have a sneaking feeling though that come the 22nd, after two or three bottles of whiskey Iâm going to wish the world had endedâ¦â¦
Definitely get in a good supply of booze and just pace yourself until the final countdown. Not much else sensible you can do, really.
Do we know what form Armageddon is going to take? Are we to go with a bang or a whimper? Will it be like Guy Fawkes Night? Catherine wheels and stuff? White-hot magma spraying all over like a roman candle? Or will everything just cease, like someone pulled the plug out?
The suspense is killing me…
The problem with Armageddon is that it doesn't happen very often, so we are heading into the unknown. It would be nice to go with a nice big Celestial Bang, but it will probably just be a quiet case of turning the lights out.
I'll let you know one way or another after The Event.
Thanks for that…
Climate change is taking care of it anyway. Sooner mankind is off this planet the better.
You are obviously sincere in that belief, so you had better lead the way?
The Mayans didn't even know the Gregorian calendar existed. The Mayans also used three different calendars so the actual 'end' may have already passed or may be due a few years hence.
More hokum to scare the masses with, not that it is really needed they are scared shitless as it is.
So how was t'budget then?
Heard sweet fanny adams about it here and yet Ireland is supposed to be Britain's best friend and closest ally… although that is the politicians talking so it may not be true.
D'you mean to say the world may have ended without anyone bothering to tell me? Fucking bastards!
The Budget? I'm giving the dust a chance to settle. I may pen a bit about it, but not today.
"I have a sneaking feeling though that come the 22nd, after two or three bottles of whiskey I’m going to wish the world had ended……"
You might be the only one left GD………Omega Man
Bloody hell! Don't fancy that. Unless of course, Sharon is Omega Woman?
Hmm, there's this green eyed blonde in a place I do a lot of business and I reckon she'd be up for it, wonder should I take a chance just in case I don't get another one?
will you be recovered in time to start again on stephens day?
'A day of morning'!!!! May the Baby Jesus forgive you.
I was in a village in Burundi where you have to walk five kilometres to a river to fetch water. They did not seem unduly perturbed at the prospect of the imminent demise of the world.
Sorry about the flag – Kigali Airport was fogbound on Wednesday night so the return journey was Kigali-Entebbe-Addis Ababa-Cairo and now Stockholm for a flight to Dublin. The end of the world will mean not making such journeys!
If Munster don't win their Heinken match on the weekend, that will be the end-of-the-world !!!
Oh, Jesus, my dear sainted mother's been wailing about this for years: apocalypse, schmapocalypse – that's just my birthday.
The world didn't end on any of the other 50-someodd times I 'celebrated' the event, don't see why it would now. The worst that ever occurred -and this was just once or twice, mind you- was that Winter actually showed up.
Oh, that was so bad it made me shudder. Wish I had thought of it.
If I don't wake up on the 22nd I'll be the sure to let you know, Grandad. Wouldn't want you to miss out on not being there any longer.