Grave reporting from TV3
I love TV3.
It has a singular inability to do anything right. It is car-crash television at its best. It is compulsive viewing simply because it is so bad.
For those of you who are foreign to these shores, TV3 pumps out an unending stream of the cheapest, tackiest American crap, interspersed with reality shows and rebroadcasts of the worst of ITV.
They do have one programme that we watch occasionally for the laugh, and that is “Tonight with Vincent Browne”. This consists of an unending stream of advertisements, with brief interruptions where Vinnie abuses his guests. It’s not meant to be funny, but it is.
The presenters on TV3 are a breed apart. The women are obviously employed on the basis of their looks rather than talent [with the exception of Ursula Halligan, who has neither] and all have to undergo a rigorous training in the Tallaghtfornian accent which is an accent that is unique to that television station.
They managed to reach a new peak of crassness yesterday, when they all but broadcast an obituary for our Minister for Hardship and Poverty, Brian Lenihan. I should point out that he isn’t dead.
I have no great love for our Glorious Government, as you may have realised. I take great delight in slagging them off, but even I draw the line at writing obituaries when they are still very much alive and kicking. Not TV3 though. Not only do they prematurely announce that Lenihan has cancer, but they then proceed to analyse the political scene after he is gone. If that isn’t enough, they drag on some Cheerful Charlie who proceeds to tell us what a terrible disease pancreatic cancer is and that the prognosis is pretty bad. He goes into great detail about how pancreatic cancer is caused by smoking [which it isn’t] and that the best that can be done for Lenihan is pain relief. Fuck me! Cheerful stuff. But then anything is permissible in TV3 in the name of a scoop.
You have to hand it to TV3. For a station that strives to be the cheapest on the airwaves, they have excelled themselves once more.
Incidentally, in case you are wondering – the TV3 news is not in widescreen. The only thing they broadcast in widescreen format is the advertisements.
But seeing as 90% of their output is advertisements, that’s OK.
They gave him & his family 2 days grace before breaking the story, generous hearted fuckers that they are.
Will this be the tipping point where nothing is sacred, any information, no matter how private or sensitive is fair game as ‘news’?
.-= Martin´s last brainfart .. Because =-.
And they made a big fucking deal about it too. They obviously just couldn’t wait to broadcast their “scoop”. That was pure sensationalist journalism at its worst, but then what else would you expect from them?
To be honest, maybe I’m a bit out of touch, but I thought there was a ‘gentleman’s agreement’ about this kind of thing amongst Irish broadcasters.
So I did actually expect better standards from them.
But the seal has been broken now, there’s never any going back, and we’ll be facing a free-for-all soon enough.
.-= Martin´s last brainfart .. Because =-.
Tabloid television at its finest. Two days grace was big of them wasn’t it?
.-= robert´s last brainfart .. Synergy =-.
Martin – The problem is that they aren’t gentlemen. You can be sure that RTE knew about the story but showed a bit of respect for the family. As Robert says – Tabloid Television at its finest.
Some things should really not be news worthy and this is one of them.
.-= Val´s last brainfart .. Merry Christmas! =-.
Sounds like all our free-to-air commercial telly. Especially during ‘summer programming’ there are more American crime shows than you can poke a stick at. I agree though, very tasteless but then these stations excel in tasteless. God that reporter can hardly string a sentence together.
Val – I suppose by the nature of his job, it is newsworthy but the very least TV3 could have done is wait from an announcement from Lenihan or his family. They just couldn’t wait to get their ‘scoop’ out.
Baino – You have no idea how bad they are. If you remember, I wrote nearly two years ago about their amazing weather man who looks like he’s bursting for a piss all the time?
Talk about stringing a topic out beyond the point of. That Ursula Halligan is a hoot though. I’ve never seen such a display of broken reporting before. She does that stutter quite well. And her ability to keep herself from showing any sort of facial expression whatsoever is nothing short of phenomenal. Do you suppose her face is glued on?
.-= Kirk M´s last brainfart .. Open Source Software. I just don’t get it. | A reply =-.
Kirk M – It almost lookes like they stopped some strange woman in the street – “Here, Love. Just look at that camera thingy and talk for two minutes about Lenihan”.
You see what I mean about car crash TV though? Just when you think it can’t get any worse, they manage to find new depths! Compulsive viewing….
Grandad – Absolutely irresistible. I couldn’t help but watch it. And I don’t believe I’ve ever heard quite that type of accent before either.
Sad news for anyone to get at Christmas. And even though he is a bastard on a good day, nobody deserves that kind of news. Bet he is sorry he did not give the health service a few bob more in the budget. I don’t recon he will have to wait on a trolley in A&E like the rest of us.
I have heard Irish TV in general reffered to as visual radio. But this is like Mirror TV.
Kirk M – That is the famous Tallaghtfornian [pronounced Talafornian] accent. It is virtually unique to their offices and studios.
Bubbles – I agree he is not exactly on my party invite list, but that’s for his political persona. His private live is his business. I have a sneaking suspicion he won’t have to rely on the public ‘health’ system though? Never heard that ‘visual radio’ line before. I like it.
I just happend to be at home in TALLAGHT for christmas when this story broke, what is this Tallaghtfornian accent you speak of. We watch RTE news in our house so I dont know what you are referring to……….careful with the old stereotyping there 🙁
Just watched that TV3 ‘report’ but had to stop half way through. They had him dead and buried the way they were reporting. That has to be the worst bit of ‘reporting’ i have ever seen in my life!!!! Where did they get your woman from? She couldnt even read from a cue. I only hope the likes of Nick Robinson never get to see that. Christ on a crutch!
Becky – Unfortunately I can’t claim credit for the accent’s name. While you were in Tallaght you could have heaved a few bricks through TV3’s windows? That is where their offices are? As for Halligan – I don’t know where the hell they got her from, but they should get their money back.
Unfortunately it is where their offices are. Although they are a bit out of my way in an industrial estate so I wouldnt have bothered my hole. Thank god I escape that tripe. I do miss some RTE though, didnt see any Reeling in the Years this time, only Nationwide from the Holy Land, glad your licence fee is paying for that and not mine 🙂 That vile fat fuck Richard Corrigan was on with Mary Kennedy trying to teach me how to cook my christmas dinner live….I hate that man.
Becky – I confess to never having seen Corrigan. I never watch cookery programmes, as I don’t see the point, as I can’t smell or taste what they are on about. It’s a bit like watching snooker in black and white. Incidentally, I pay my licence fee for Sharon. She’s worth every penny.
tv3 today showed a pair of boobies and it wasnt even half 4 in the evening,, more like 4:20pm actually but yes they were naked and ya got to see EVERY bit of em… tweas the movie with that barbra streissland chick in it. they werent her boobs tho,,
PJ – Welcome. I’m afraid even the promise of naked boobs wouldn’t make me watch that channel. I have my standards. Anyway, I prefer my boobs in the flesh, as it were. 😉
we all prefer boobs in the flesh but come on,, tits on tvs and it wsnt even half 4 in the evenin? cant believe nobody else spotted it.
Maybe they know no one is watching? [except yourself, of course! 😉 ]