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I have seen the future of TV…. — 21 Comments

  1. Bloody hell Grandad, don’t rouse the ire of Irish Psychics Live, they’re more powerful than the scientologists. Why, I bet it is their psycho-kinetic powers that deposit the out-sized poo at your gate on a daily basis. And they all look like Christopher Walken in The Dead Zone.

  2. Ah now Grandad, leave Vincent Browne out of this.

    He may not be in Des Lynam’s league when it comes to presenting but he seems to be one of the few people in this country who can make the slimy fuckers up in Leinster house squirm a little.

    His scatter gun approach means everybody is fair game for his ire. A few weeks ago he had reps from FF and FG (their names escape me now) on the show to discuss the finer points of Berties ropey as fuck err… interesting… finances. The FG head looked to be chomping at the bit to get stuck into Bertie and FF… when Vincent turned on him and began grilling him on the amount of money he had spent on his campaing for the local elections, accusing him of essentially buying the seat. Caught him completely on the hop and no amount of “I came on here to talk about..” would wash with VB.

    You never know where he’s going to strike next and it makes for great viewing.

  3. Aaaargh! Martin bloody King. My wife can testify that, when that muppet comes on, I jump on the remote faster than I would a hundred euro note in the breeze. On the plus side, he may act as a cautionary tale such that RTÉ won’t again try to introduce non-meteorologists for their forecasts.

  4. I just watched the clip, now I’m off to take some motion sickness pills and start my day. Thanks so much for sharing.

  5. Grandad,

    To be fair to TV3, I don’t think they have much money to do anything with. RTE have the market so rigged that they get the TV licence money and the bulk of the advertising revenues, leaving the TV3 operation at a cardboard and string level. Combining RTE dominance with the impact of satellite channels, I don’t think they have much chance of ever being a significant broadcaster.

    What’s the point of weather forecasts in Ireland, anyway? It’s either rain with cloud or cloud with rain, with the chance of some occasional sunshine.

    Does anyone watch Channel 6? We don’t have cable, so I’ve never seen it. Is it as bad as TV3?

  6. Thrifty – Those ‘psychics’ know as much about the future as I do. They’re just bored housewives doing a part time job, reading from a script.

    TBA – I take your point. He is good at keeping them on the hook, but he is very bad as a presenter. He looks as if he’s half asleep and can’t wait to get back to his cocaine/whiskey/bed [delete whichever applicable]. He should watch Jeremy Paxman a few times.

    Andrew – I find he is compulsive viewing. I used to switch over just to watch him, he is so bad. He has a squirm factor that is off the scale.

    Sorry S Mum, but you were warned.

    Ian – Don’t be making pathetic excuses for them. If they can’t afford it, they shouldn’t be on. The only thing I’ll say in their favour is that Channel 6 is worse. [Now available on all good Sky dishes!] If I want unadulterated American crap, I have hundreds of other satellite channels to choose from.

  7. Really? I thought that was the “other premium numbers”. Perhaps they double up? Do they ever loose track of which they supposed to be doing?

  8. Thrifty – They all go to the same place. It’s the same bored housewives who do the whole lot. The mind boggles!

  9. I was going to ask if anyone watches Channel 6 but Ian beat me to it.

    I’ve often seen the listings when browsing through the menus but I have yet to see something there of interest to me.

    Most channels are crap though. Sky one should be renamed “The Simpsons Channel”, Sky news should be renamed “Sky anything but news” and all that seems to be on E4 is Friends!

    I don’t bother watching T.V. much anymore. Instead I wander around the web leaving comments on blogs etc. etc. etc. 😐

  10. Grannymar – No. I not have an OFF button. Herself has appropriated the remote control. Anyway, then I’d have nothing to write about today?

    Robert – I noticed that! There are about five or six programmes a week that are worth watching on the five hundred or so channels…..

  11. There are a great number of people who swear ‘I don’t bother watching T.V. much anymore’, yet they cannot live without TV. Is the fun found in channel hopping and not watching?

  12. Ooh feeling a bit queezy now!

    Being an early riser, Sunday morning here is the worst. American Evangelical services and Hillsong feature on 3 of our 5 channels! “Lord be praised . . ” The other two insist on half hour advertorials of a product that cure’s Jessica Simpson and P Diddy’s pimples! I am less of a vidiot these days and more of a bloggiot thanks to lousy TV. Everything sounds better in an Irish accent mind!

  13. Baino – Wouldn’t you fancy watching him every night 😉

    We have somewhere around 500 channels here, maybe more [I haven’t counted them in a while]. A block of them are wall to wall God Botherers. We also have channels dedicated to wine, teachers, selling crap, moving house and foreign holidays. About the only subject not covered by a dedicated channel is blogging. Be thankful for small mercies!!

  14. I, like Baino get an entire array of channels on my TV. All six of them!
    Two channels I don’t watch, CW and ABC.
    On NBC I only watch The Tonight Show, occasionally.
    On PBS I watch a couple of their documentary, historical and scientific kinda’ shows.
    Fox has ‘Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader’. I like that show.
    CBS on the other hand has sucked me in. I watch my local 6pm news and their national news also. I enjoy cursing and swearing at Katie Couric. I do it quite a lot.
    CBS has also resumed a show I like called Jericho. Don’t call me between 2200 and 2300 Tuesday nights. It has replaced the 24 in the TV mythology of my mind.
    Also CBS has a show that comes on WAY too late at night, 0030, called ‘The Late, Late Show with Craig Ferguson’. He is too too funny and on late enough at night that he doesn’t have to be politically correct.
    So unlike those that come home from work and immediatly turn on the vidiot box I try to be somewhat selective in what I watch.
    The kids at the used DVD store know me by name. Maybe I go there too much. Ya’ think?

  15. you should try Argentinian TV. Now I speak reasonable Spanish mind, but they talk gibberish at 110 miles an hour, 24/7 here. The weathermen don’t get paid too much though, as it’s fairly easy and cheap to find someone to say “Manana es Scorchio!”

  16. Brianf – You should try watching our version of the Late Late Show. It is the only chat show in the world that is presented by a Plank. It would turn you off the vitiot box for life.

    DVDs are very bad for you. Unless of course you copy them and sell the copies down the pub, in which case they’re very good for you.

    Welcome Quickroute! 🙂 I don’t speak a word of Spanish, but “Manana es Scorchio!â€?? I think even I can understand that! Nice one!!

  17. What the fuck flew up your ass??? What I see in TV3 is quality production for little money, unlike rte who pump ten times the amount and produce tripe such as “Your a Star????” as for the presenters. Martin King does nothing wrong but ad colour to something that is normally dreary and boring. You just personally abused the guy too so i know you don’t personally know him as if you did you wouldnt say that. Get a life CUNT.
    as for the rest of the presenters. They produced some of the top presenters in ireland, would you prefare Ryan Tubardy or Pat Kenny???? paid more money PA than TV3 makes. so get rid of the grudge(probably because they fired your Ma as a cleaner for steeling cultery) and climb out of yoru own ass…

  18. Hi Dars, and welcome.

    Just out of interest – How come you found this post by Googling “tv3 vincent browne is a wanker”? A strange thing to search for if you are such a fan?

    From the tone and content of your comment, I would normally assume that you work for TV3. But then I have seen your e-mail address? 😉

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