I can’t shake the constant feeling that I’m waiting for something.
My problem is that I don’t know what I’m waiting for.
Am I waiting for Asteroid “2001 FO32” to smash into the planet and put us all out of our misery? I don’t think so as unfortunately it will probably miss. That would have been a lark?
Am I waiting for another heart attack? A couple of years ago that never would have occurred to me but since my little “event” there has been a niggling thought that such a thing is possible: not inevitable or even probable, just possible. The last time the only bit of warning was an apparent dose of indigestion and I have had some indigestion since but it seems it was just that – indigestion. Not enough curry or something. Leastwise it’s a constant thought tucked away at the back of my mind. I’m not immortal after all.
Am I waiting for this current world insanity to end? Well, obviously. I’m sick and tired of it It’s reaching the point where I would nearly prefer to catch the fucking Virus and get it over with. I pine for normality; for my coffee in the village and being able to see people’s faces again. But that’s not going to happen for a while. And they keep making that while a good bit longer.
Am I waiting for my vaccination? This sort of ties in with the last one. Paradoxically I’m not. I don’t want anything pumped into my arm thank you very much. I have heard such a barrage of information as to how great the vaccinations are that my attitude has become one of distrust. If you keep telling me it is that fucking great then there must be something wrong with it.
Am I waiting for the postman? No. I’m not expecting anything. Unless someone wants to post me some whiskey as a surprise?
Am I waiting for inspiration? Now this is a front runner. Things do happen here [like a house full of kids and dogs and Daughter yesterday] but nothing of interest to write about. You don’t want transcripts of long and very interesting chats with Grandson the Younger? He’s an extremely intelligent and bright kid who spends his time asking questions on very diverse topics. Daughter keeps saying he keeps reminding her of me. He doesn’t have a beard yet though. I’m working on the pipe.
Anyhows, whatever it is I am waiting for still hasn’t happened.
Now where the fuck is Godot?