Google in major breach of privacy
I cut the grass yesterday.
Naturally I had to jump through all the hoops that such a job entails. The battery was nearly flat and one of the tyres definitely was.
While the battery was on a quick charge I removed the offending wheel. Naturally I couldn’t inflate it due to the old tubeless tyre problem.
Of course I remembered the sage advice I received the last time I had this particular quandary, which was to use barbecue lighter fluid. So I brought the wheel out onto the front drive [in case I demolished or at least set fire to the garage. I poured the fluid into the tyre and set fire to it.
It lit all right but the whole wheel just vanished in a sea of flame, which wasn’t supposed to happen. What was worse, I hadn’t taken the precaution of having a bucket of water on standby. As luck would have it, I was in need of an urgent pee so that was that problem solved. Luckily no one passed my gate on the lane, or they might have wondered what the fuck I was doing.
I eventually got the tyre inflated using a new invention of mine – a mixture of Vaseline and washing up liquid [patent pending], and got the battery juiced up enough to get things started. I mowed the lawn which was a bitch as the grass was about six inches deep and was sopping wet.
But what has this got to do with my headline about Google, you ask?
By coincidence I was messing around with Google Earth afterwards and checked out The Manor. Fuck me but there I was mowing the lawn!
I grant that it’s a little fuzzy and the weird lava flow on the bottom right is in fact a shadow of a tree and not a lava flow but I am clearly identifiable in the act of finishing off that corner of the lawns. You can see that I was wearing a white t-shirt and my hair is in need of a comb. Scandalous!
I never gave permission for that photograph. My garden is a private place and there are strict privacy laws governing over flights by drones which presumably also apply to satellites. But they have the absolute gall to not only to spy on me in my private space to to publish that photograph in a place where the entire fucking planet can see it.
I’m going to sue them for millions.
That has made me chuckle a lot. Thanks!
Well, at least they didn’t capture you in the act of pissing on your burning tire!
I’m not ashamed of my ingenuity!
Nor should you be, but that would have taken the breach of privacy to a whole new level.
The ‘ignition trick’ works best with gas, rather than BBQ lighter-fluid – the butane gas generates a rapid expansion (i.e. explosion) which seats the tyre-bead on the rim (lighter-fluid burns rather than explodes).
An alternative is to strap a very tight belt around the circumference of the tyre, which presses the tyre-bead into the wheel, then inflating with an air-line – this is aided by liquid-soap liberally blathered around the bead/rim contact area, it helps the seal to become airtight more quickly and aids the tyre-bead slipping into position against the wheel.
OK, so I’m a tyre-anorak – years of struggling to re-seat tyres in inconvenient locations had to have some value.
“lighter-fluid burns rather than explodes” Yup – discovered that. Also the fluid was French which explains a lot too.
The belt trick is fine if I can find something strong enough with some kind of tightening mechanism. A rope does work but I really need something like an oil-filter chain.
Another alternative is to buy inner tubes!
The motor-trade used to have an inflatable belt-device for that purpose, but I never saw one small enough for a mower-tyre. Tie-down ratchet-straps can be an effective alternative.
One other trick is to bounce the wheel & tyre vigorously on the ground, all around its circumference – that can help the bead to get enough of a starter-seal in order to take some initial inflation pressure.
Forget Google, I think you should contact David Attenborough. You have I believe discovered a first sighting of the long lost Palaeeudyptinae.
Hold on now! I think I would have noticed if there was a seven foot very fat penguin lying on my lawn? [I’ll have another look, just in case….]
Unless it’s Tux? come to sort out that server of yours! 🙂
You were lucky you were wearing your tee shirt – the Google cams have caught some people with nothing on!
I doubt if the resolution was good enough to cause any concern? Now Street View is a different matter [and my hedges are tall enough to block that].
LOL! That’s beautiful!
I’ve had the good fortune of living between several abandoned properties over the years in my little row home. Why was that good fortune? Heh, Google Earth and the CIA and the FBI and the NOA (Nasty Ol’ Antismokers) looked down and saw nothing but the overhanging tree cover!
– MJM, who’ll now readjust his tinfoil hat…
P.S. Good seein’ ya again Rambles! Been a while… somehow I lost this link a bit ago in my morass! I’m spending too much time banging away over on Quora lately! Keep on fightin’ guy! :>
Welcome back Michael! The only thing of interest about looking at my garden from orbit is in comparing different photographs from different times. It’s scary how fast my trees are growing
Before you sue them for millions you might take it into account that the Google Earth image was dated 6/28/18. Unless you managed to send yourself back to the recent past when the grass was a bit easier to mow? I mean, you managed a miracle with your service provider why not a bit of time travel as well? Minor stuff in comparison.