A turd on legs — 18 Comments

  1. Good grief! Are you serious?

    I hope it wasn’t the little blind dog that you wrote about recently!

  2. Darren – I don’t know what it is about my life, but these weird things keep happening to me. Every word above is the God’s honest truth. I couldn’t make it up!

    Robert – No. The blind dog was white. This one was apparently black and white. He’s now brown.

  3. Christ that is funny, though for a fleeting moment I thought you were going to tell us the dog had drowned in poo. I’m glad you didn’t. That would be sad.

  4. Thrifty – I try not to post sad stories. The only bit I would have liked to have added is the owners reactions when the dog got home!! 😉

  5. We had several Jack Russels when I was growing up, they never found a septic tank, but sometimes whatever they rolled in was very reminiscent of one. Still nothing to match the all over drippy stench that dog will have

  6. Thrifty – All dogs roll in a turd if they find it interesting, so all dog owners will be familiar with the stink, and the smear on the neck. But can you imagine a dog that has actually been swimming in liquid human excrement?

    The mind boggles.

  7. If I saw a large shite licking itself my immediate reaction would be that it was John Waters.

  8. Sure dogs LOVE rolling around in shite. Said dwoggy only did it for the bitches! He is the #1 bachelor around your parts now…
    Clever dwoggy!

  9. There is a huge difference between rolling in it and swimming in it. Try it sometime, and you’ll see what I mean.

    As for being #1 bachelor – I think he’ll stay that way until hosed down..!

  10. Poor wee beastie – from innocently backing out a few turds of its own and now resembling a giant one itself.

    I remember our septic being drained when I was a kid. Being Australia, the top layer had dried into a firm ~ahem~ ‘crud crust’ and the apprentice plumber was dared to walk on it. He did and, of course, fell in with faeces up to his face level.

    My Dad laughed until he cried, telling me later that, “I used to teach Darren year 10 biology and he was a right little bugger. Glad to see that he got what he deserved.”

  11. Hi Kath. [An unfamiliar name here?] Your father has a disgusting sense of humour. I think we would get on well. 😉

  12. Too true, I am unfamiliar but somehow found my way here via a cyber-walkabout from MooDog. I’ll no doubt be tempted to put down my Farmers Union Iced Coffee and Vili’s pepper pasty long enough to make a few inane comments.
    Like your work, Grandad!

  13. Actually, I’ve just looked, and there IS a big brown shite licking itself on my bed. But then that’s nothing unusual…

  14. E Mum – That is no way to talk about your husband! [unless you mean Bertie, and he is not a shite]

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