Waiting
Dear God,
I am writing to you in desperation.
I have led a good life. I have never done anyone any harm [apart from a couple of tourists but they don’t count] and treat all your creation with great respect [apart from wasps]. What have I done to annoy you?
Are you having a laugh? Is all this crap weather a wee joke? If so, then I think your humour is a little warped. You must realise that a joke can wear thin. And this joke has frankly gone totally anorexic.
I completely understand if this is the start of a Biblical Flood. The world has gone to the dogs, and maybe a Flood is a good idea. It worked before. But last time you at least had the courtesy to tell Noah in advance. If it is a Biblical Flood, then at least warn me so that I can start rounding up a few animals. Just in case, I have started construction on the ark and it’s coming on quite well. I have made provision for all the animals [except wasps, tourists and politicians].
Could you please stop faffing about. Could you please tell me if this is the flood, or is this just your warped humour? Even better – could you please give us a bit of summer?
Yours in dampness,
Grandad
P.S. That lightning bolt that just hit my favourite tree wasn’t funny either.
G
Summer has been temporarily delayed. It shall be resumed in early September, just in time for the kids that will be going returning to school.
Temporarily?????
Can I have that in writing please?
The prophecy of the Cully and Scully bowls is soon to be fulfilled. *cue epic music*
I didn’t know there was a prophecy. You must teach me some of this occult thingy.
Incidentally, there is no ‘c’ in Sully. They get annoyed about that.
Funny you mention the Cully and Sully bowls. We still have relations with us that were over for a wedding recently. They are heading away today back to the UK complete with a set of 8 matching Cully and Sully bowls!
You should have sent them here. Then they could have gone with 800.
‘Grey Skies are gonna clear UP, put on a happy f..’ click..click.. BANG!!!!!
Cully and Sully??? Wah de fuh? Have I missed out on some defining moment of our times?
Just did a search in Google for ‘Cully and Sully bowls’ and the first two results are Headrambles.com.
“Just did a search in Google for ‘Cully and Sully bowls’ and the first two results are Headrambles.com.”
It’s all part of a hostile take-over bid. I’m going to be a millionaire, selling fish-pies!!
How many bowls have you sold on eBay?
About 50,000
I thought at first Grannymar asked about bowels.
Get God on the phone and podcast it.
I’d like to, but He won’t let me. He said it was something to do with copyright or confidentiality.
And Grannymar doesn’t have ceramic bowels [as far as I know].
Ah Grandad,
Not speaking for God (Pope Benedict says he does, so none of the rest of us can), I would say, personally speaking, that there might be blessing in rain – it keeps people who have barbecues and ghetto blasters inside their homes. The air is not filled with the scent of burnt chicken and the strains of Celine Dion.
It’s a pain this evening, though. It’s Herself’s birthday and I have a boat charter from Dun Laoghaire as a surprise for her. We were going to do a run down to Bray Head, it looks more like a run up to the Liffey and back at the moment.
PB only thinks he does!!
You have a point about the ghetto blasters, but there is always the Queen Solution 🙂
I’ll see if I can arrange for the rain to ease a bit for this evening……… [and wish her a Happy Birthday from me!]
Brillant !
Can’t wait for the galway races / swim.
Well Grandad since you disrespect my beloved Canada so much i though I should tell you it will be a balmy 33 degrees tomorrow with a humidex of 42 and nary a cloud in the sky.
Put that in your pipe and smoke it along with some quality BC bud
LMAO
It’s not raining is it? Bugger that. I’m staying in.
I saw those pies in SuperValu in Cavan lately.
You bastard, you’re infecting everyone! How much are they paying you?
I’m with Sean, Grandad.
The weather here today is brilliant sunshine, low humidity and the birds are singing their tunes to the Irish tourists who are gracing our shores at the moment. We love them, and welcome them to our country.
Remember, tourism is a two way street so be nice!
A lovely 80 degrees here. Not a cloud to be seen for miles around. There is a gentle breeze from out of the south. I think I’ll spend this evening on the front porch watching the animals scurry about while listening to the birds sing their delightful song of summer joy. While there I’ll have a cuppa tea and read a book. Maybe after the sun goes down I’ll enjoy a nice glass of Jamesons while relaxing in the yard, under a tree. The far off sounds of the children playing a game of baseball will fill the evening air with the laughter and delight of youth and summer.
Oh, I’m sorry! What were you saying about the weather?
Sean – Will you stop whinging about how I’m supposed to hate Canada. Canada is the only decent place on the North American Continent. Followed by Mexico.
I’m glad you are enjoying our weather. [and that goes to Brianf and Nancy too]. Can we have it back when you are finished with it please?
Daz – See my comment of 11:55am.
Flirty – You’re not going to give Bertie a loan are you? Or are you a builder? Or to people go to the Galway Races for something else?
Sneezy – Are you relying on me for the weather forecast now?
lol granda
I humbly apologize for my oversight
and as a fat man I would very gladly trade you for the nice weather that 40 shit is way to over the top
I would love to take up fishing from the patio and lazy days drinking beer
That sounds very nice and relaxing, Sean. I might take you up on that, even though I havent fished in fifty years.
well Grandad I figured it would be a good way to while away the 40 days and 40 nights on the ark
I suppose you are right, there. We’ll all have to take up fishing soon, as all the farming land is under water. And it will be practice for when the Big Flood arrives..