Hard to swallow

I came across a site during the week.

It's one of those tax funded "charities" across the water that is designed to scare with "startling" figures, to nag people into what they consider a "healthy lifestyle" and presumably to lobby the gubmint.

It is a surreal sort of site and gives me the impression that they were in a terrible hurry to put the whole lot together.  Maybe they were anxious to grab as much funding as possible as quickly as possible?  Was there a deadline for applications for a grant?  Maybe they just haven't a clue?  Who knows?

Anyhows, I give you GULP.

Now GULP apparently stands for Give Up Loving Pop, which is one of the worst acronyms I have ever come across and I have come across quite a few.  They obviously came up with the acronym first and then had to work out what it stood for.  I'll give 'em 0 out of 10 for that.

I think it was Twitter that mentioned the site and they pointed me towards their new video campaign [grandly attributed as a “GULP film”!].  I have watched it a couple of times and still can't make head nor tail of it.  I haven't a fucking clue what the film is supposed to demonstrate.  Whoever directed it must have been suffering from an overdose of sugar at the time?  I'll give 'em 0 out of 10 for clarity and effort.

They have a flashy little yoke on their front page which purports to show how many drinks have been consumed and stuff like that, which is a load of bollox – it just shows that their little JavaScript counters work and has fuck all to do with real life.  0 out of 10 for that.

The site is full of their "startling revelations" and catchy little phrases –

Drink less sugar and there'll be less obesity – who knew?!  Who cares?

Surely a study of 90,000 women can't be wrong?!  It all depends on what the questions were and how slanted they were.

If you want to increase your liver fat by 142% then keep drinking the sugar! 142%?  Not 143%? Not 141%?  What do I have to do to increase it by 150%?

Drinking sugary drinks can be a catalyst to ageing! No. Time is a catalyst to ageing, unless sugar distorts the space/time continuum?

Dentists have a name for children who drink too much Mountain Dew… Patients?  Clients?  Customers?

Just one can of sugary drink a day can increase YOUR chance of heart disease!  So can a lot of things.  Life, for example.

Want to know how 90% of the population can halt weight gain?!  Not really, but I would suggest more exercise?

I'll give 1 out of 10 for that little list because it gave me  laugh.

I didn't read the site too thoroughly because they have used that modern infuriating gimmick of using light grey text on a white background which makes it next to impossible to read.  Anyway the bits I did read just gave me a headache.  -1 out of 10 for design.

Overall the impression I get is of a small group of people [who know fuck all about web design] who have a bit of a hang-up about Coca Cola.  I have a hang-up about Coca Cola – I don't like the stuff, but I don't go on about it.  I don't know what they hope to achieve by their little campaign, apart from granting themselves nice salaries?  Are they hoping Coca Cola will throw in the towel, admitting defeat in the face of such staggering and scientific opposition? 

I doubt that will happen somehow.

The should call themselves WALOS.

What A Load Of Shite.

It makes as much sense?

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Hard to swallow — 8 Comments

  1. Who the hell funds these wretched bloody groups anyway, wouldn't be the taxpayer, now would it? Btw Grandad, OT but are there any Irish charities you would recommend? Sick to death of the usual bunch/es of con artists. Is there any charity that specially deserves Xmas generosity?

    • Of course it's the tax payer.  Who else?

      First on my list of charities is ASH.  No.  Not joking.  Ash Animal Rescue – a fantastic group who rescue animals and who have a no-kill policy.  They work almost exclusively off donations.  That's where we got our Penny.  Links are on my sidebar [the link with the dog!  Heh!].

      • Thanks GD, an animal charity that isn't the ISPCA is great, I assume the ISPCA is the same as the UK version – meaning I would rather flush my money down the toilet than donate it to them.

        • I would imagine they are much the same.  I know they get a substantial grant every year.

          I can't sing Ash's praises loud enough.  They have a full farm of animals – cats, dogs, donkeys, foxes and a load more.  They never refuse an animal and try to find homes for all.  They neuter and vaccinate all animals and give them any treatment required before re-homing [and they personally inspect every prospective home for suitability].  Between vets' bills, their fuel and food bills, I honestly don't know how they do it.

  2. Yeah the "War On" brigade make for some stupendously stupid things being said.

    Why can't they just push the things that do work.

    Everything in moderation or as it can be known a balanced diet.

    Also the only weight loss method that actually means anything – Eat less, move around more.

    • Welcome Verey! I'm not even sure I want 'em to push things that do work.  My stance is that they should all fuck off, preferably to Mars or the Sun and just stop nagging everyone about their life and health.  I am sick to the teeth at being preached at by busybodies who think they know more about my health and body than I do.  Anything and everything in moderation is fine by me, but I will decide what defines "moderation".

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