I don't know what happened this morning.
I did my usual check to see if this site was running and it wasn't.
All I got was a blank white screen. Fuck!
I tried to nip into the engine room, but that wasn't there either. Fuck-fuck!
Now I hadn't done anything to the site, and I don't allow it to do anything to itself because it might break itself. So neither of us had done anything yet my poor site and all the hard work had vanished in a puff of white page.
I tried everything. I tried setting the site back to yesterday when I knew it worked. That was no good. I tried removing stuff box by box. That didn't work. In the end I deleted the whole damned site and reverted it to the latest version that I knew worked [i.e. yesterday]. That didn't work.
I was getting a little pissed off at this stage and realised there was just one tiny file I hadn't mucked with and that was the little file that tells the site where everything is and where its information is stored. Naturally the site won't work without it. I deleted everything in that file except for the barest essentials. The site worked!
I started replacing bits into that file until eventually the site went up in white smoke again. At last I had found the culprit. It was one teensy little line of code I had added about six weeks ago and hadn't changed it since. But now for some fucking reason it was screwing the brains out of the whole shebang.
If you can read this, then the site is reasonably back to normal, if you can call this site normal. If you can't see it and are only getting a blank page then something must still be wrong.
I know my favourite trolls, Supershadow and the CIA are all going to claim credit for smashing my site but I know for a fact it wasn't any of them.
Personally I blame Brexit.
Last October England brought in a law banning smoking in cars where cheeeldren were present.
The Irish Antis weren't too happy at being pipped at the post [they love being “first in the world”] as the same law didn't come into force here until January this year.
However the laws have been in force for the last nine or six months depending on your country of choice.
It hasn't quite worked out they way they hoped but it has worked exactly as predicted – the police are ignoring it. Of course those who live in the hermetically sealed bubble-wrapped world of the Tobacco Control Industry have this idea that we all think like them. Forget crime. Forget Brexit. Forget disease. The most important thing in the world is protecting the cheeeldren from the evil machinations of Big Tobacco, and it is the only thing we should ever concentrate on to the exclusions of everything else. Remember Margaret Chan of the WHO fucking off to Moscow to talk about Tobacco Control in the middle of an Ebola epidemic?
The police in both countries have better things to do. They are there to enforce laws that protect people and property from actual danger and not some half baked notion that cars are mobile gas chambers. In England and Wales they have so far issued a massive seven warnings and no fines whatsoever. Quite right too – it's not the job of police to do the work of Health Fascists.
There seems to have been no word lately on "plain packs"? This is another measure Tobacco Control considers to be a "groundbreaking measure" to eliminate smoking, yet it will have precisely the same effect as the car laws – zero. Each move they make seems to be the "final nail in the coffin of Big Tobacco", yet each move now is completely ignored.
It really is time they fucked off out of town.
And the horse they rode in on.
When I started on this Interweb lark there was no such thing as Google.
In fact there was barely an Interweb at all. PCs ran Windows 3.1 and if you wanted to access the wonders of the outside world you had to install extra memory, a shed load of software and a browser. My browser of choice was Netscape [Gold] and my search engine of preference was Hotbot.
Since then I have forsaken Windows and all their crappy, slow, bug ridden, expensive software and have moved to the brighter world of Linux, where everything is reliable, virus free, fast and – well – free. I have retained my allegiances to Netscape and the Mozilla project and always use Firefox and Thunderbird [How does anyone prefer Outlook? Fuck but it's the crappiest piece of shit ever invented]. I have also moved over to Google for my searches.
I have a thing about Big Business inveigling their way into my life. I have never used Internet Explorer, partly because Microsoft tried to insist I did and partly because it's a festering pile of manure. I won't use Chrome or whatever it's called because Google keep pushing it at me. I do however, and with great reluctance, use Google for searches simply because it works and I'm now used to it.
Lately they have been pissing me off.
One day I went to do a search and a window popped up ordering me to accept their new "terms of service" or some such nonsense. I couldn't get rid of the fucking pop-up so was forced to agree [there was no other option]. Fuck that. Next day the same thing happened on YouTube. FUCK OFF, GOOGLE!!!!
Google's reason for all of this is that they wanted to "help" me. They basically wanted to just show me advertisements that I would be "interested" in. Boy have they got a lot to learn! No advertisements interest me. They are a niggling irritation that distract me and slow things down so I have installed AdBlock Plus. So Google can target their advertisements all they like, as I won't see 'em. If I want to buy something I'll do my own research thanks very much.
I have just about all my preferences set to "off". They can fuck off if they want to know where I live, what I search for or what I watch on YouTube. They did offer to create a file showing all my search history. I thought that might be interesting so I told 'em to go ahead. Ten minutes later they told me my results were ready so I downloaded them. What I got was a web page showing all my searches.
No "data found".
Hah! Fuck you, Google.