We are all still here!

Now to most of you this will come as no surprise at all.  To the elderly amongst us it may come as a greater surprise but nevertheless most of us take it for granted that when we wake up the world will still be merrily spinning its way around the Sun.

This morning however, I was delighted and more than a little amazed to find us still merrily waltzing around between Mars and Venus.


Well, you see our friends over at CERN have started playing with their new toy again.  Their billions dollar Large Hadron Collider blew up the last time they tried it and they had to resort to duct tape and string to get it to work again.  They then decided that they needed a few more billions to rebuild it, which they did and they fired it up again this morning.  Fair play to them.

I have no objection to anyone playing with anything [and you can interpret that any way you like] but I do have some minor concerns about this LHC yoke.  You see, they are playing around with some quite dangerous stuff here.  Playing around with dynamite is fine by me but playing around with black holes and anti-matter is quite frankly a whole new ballgame.

Now I'm not too worried about anti-matter as if they create that, it will probably just vapourise Switzerland and a good chunk of France but black holes are a whole different matter, as it were.  Create a black hole and you're fucked.  It works by sucking in matter and the more matter it sucks, the stronger it sucks and it won't stop until there is nothing left to suck, and that includes you and me.  It's a bit like a Dyson on steroids.

Maybe I would be a little less concerned if the scientists hadn't openly admitted that they haven't a fucking clue what they are doing?

From my understanding, they are trying to find out what atoms are made of by pulverising them into tiny pieces, which is somewhat akin to smashing a watch with a seldgehammer to see what makes it tick?  And now they have doubled the size of the sledgehammer to make the pieces even smaller?

I presume we have all ultimately paid for this machine?  Unless they have used extraterrestrial funding then the money has to come from somewhere and as usual I must have contributed from my taxes.  I agree that the amount I would have unwittingly donated would be miniscule and in all likelihood I probably only own an atom or two.

But why do I have the feeling it's my atom they're trying to smash?

P.S. Has anyone checked today to see if Switzerland is still there?

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The sledgehammer approach — 9 Comments

    • Unless of course we fall through the black hole into another dimension or an alternative universe?  I'm quite happy with the number of dimensions I have at the moment.  Any more or any less could be very confusing?

  1. ""Has anyone checked today to see if Switzerland is still there?"

    In the normal course of events how long would you expect it to be before somebody noticed"

    • Good question.  I suppose the Swiss would be first to notice but seeing as they've gone into the hole, I doubt they care any more.

  2. You mentioned a "Dyson on steroids" and I'm thinking what the hell has a Dyson sphere have to do with a black hole and you're talking about a damn vacuum cleaner. Sheesh!

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