Living dangerously
I watched a programme on television the other night.
I don’t remember exactly what the programme was about as like most programmes these days, it was instantly forgettable.
One thing I do remember about it was a scene where this couple were inspecting a field where they were building a house.
It was a large field, and work had commenced at some stage, as some of the top soil had been shifted, and the foundations were marked out. So what was remarkable about that?
What impressed me was that the couple were both wearing those horrible yellow hard hats.
Why?
I can understand construction workers wearing them on a building site, as there is a fair chance some Lithuanian is going to drop a length of scaffolding pole from about fifty floors up. When the pipe impales the worker to the ground, the boss can wash his hands of the whole business because the victim was wearing a helmet.
I can understand Duncan Stewart wearing one all the time, because he is a wanker and looks daft anyway. I think he wears his to bed.
But why were these two wearing helmets in the middle of a field? What were they afraid of? Were they suffering from Chicken Little Syndrome? Did they have an aversion to bird shit?
Then it occurred to me – I bet it was another one of those Nanny Laws that are all pervasive in society now. If you are in an area designated as a construction site you must wear a hard hat?
Life is full of little dangers. Where I am sitting now, I am surrounded by death and destruction, if I should be so stupid as to stick my finger in an power socket, or slash my wrists with a knife. Frankly, if I did either of those things, then I deserve to go. You can’t argue with Darwin.
But if the Nanny State had its way, all my knives would be blunter than Mary Harney’s arse and all my power sockets wouldn’t have holes in them, just in case.
Darwin has a very strong case to answer. Nature dictates that the weak perish and the strong survive. It’s good for the species. So by protecting the likes of Duncan Stewart from falling concrete blocks, we are in fact weakening the human race.
I will leave you to ponder upon that though.
While you are doing that, I shall boil the kettle and make myself a mug of tea.
Now, where did I put my asbestos suit?
I was reading a study sometime last year where it is reckoned that all these new health and safety signs that are all over building sites actually result in an increase in accidents. Mainly small ones that don’t make the news like a brick falling on someones head or something like that. Or some one stepping on a nail.
Because these signs are everywhere on a site, those working there automatically ‘tune’ them out after a while because they get so used to them and of course they all look the same. So if one sign is changed from warning of falling debris to exposed wires for example it comes as a big shock (pun unintended) when someone gets zapped for not reading the sign.
Haha – best blog post I’ve read all week. Now that the Plank is slowly and gradually leaving our TVs, can we now endeavour – with equal gusto – towards getting Hard-Hat off it too? And bury him in his 6 inch insulation? It seems suddenly inappropriate [as well as very tedious] to watch couples build their dream eco pads on some flood plain in the midlands and inviting Hard-Hat back for coffee when it’s all finished but leaking / sinking. “Lovely”, “Super”, “Great”….grrrr.
Robert – The problem with these signs is that the damned things are everywhere. Walk dow any street and all you see are signs forbidding this or compelling that. We are subjected to a barrage of orders telling us what to do or what not to do. So everyone is just immune to them now.
SHoop – What really piised me off about him is the smug way he talks about ‘renewable rescources’ and the way every second word is prefixed with ‘eco’. He is such a smug condescending little shit.
Bloody silly hard hats. And bloody signs. There’s one along the road here that says ‘slow children playing’ which I think is a tad harsh. I mean, just because they’re not rocket scientists….
I was thinking of jazzing it up by adding one that says ‘Bonus: €10 per child’. That’ll make the little sods cycle a bit faster.
E Mum – I love it! I am a great collector of signs. I saw a huge graffiti today that said something along the lines of “STOP THE VIOLENCE-FREE PALESTINE”. I would have thought that Palestine was anything but violence free??
Problem is that all these warning signs are too banal in language and expression that they’ve lost their impact.
Now here’s a sign that works: http://www.mountelephantpancakes.com.au/photos.htm
It’s like trafficators. If you use them at every turn you don’t have to think about it. If you don’t always use them one day you will fuck up. Same as always check your weapon is unloaded before you clean it. Even if you know it is; or one day you will shoot yourself. Hard hats same thing.
I work on a building site and have never worn a hard hat. Why, only this afternoon I was clobbered in the cranium by a falling scaffold pipe, but do I complain about it? Do I heck.
No, I just pick myself up, dust myself off and where the hell am I who are all you people oh Jesus I think I’m having some kind of an episode somebody call an ambulance what a world what a world what a world.
Perhaps it was simply to give you a memorable moment from the program.(maker of hard hat was probably the sponsor)