Picture me thus
I received an email this morning.
Actually I received over sixty copies of the same mail into a couple of my mail accounts. Whoever this bloke is, he really wants to get his message across.
I have had this one before [though not quite so persistently]. He claims to have accessed my laptop which I know he didn’t. He claims to have planted a Trojan which allowed access to my files and camera. He didn’t. He claims to have watched me watching porn. Dream on, Sunshine. I’m too old for that sort of shit. I prefer to watch videos of steam locomotives. I don’t do that very often though; I find videos tire my eyes easily.
He claims to have a video of me satisfying myself. This is the bit I find a bit confusing. I assume he means he has watched me smoking my pipe. That indeed is very satisfying and he’d be welcome – if he had managed to do it, which he didn’t. Or maybe he meant watching me eat a sandwich?
Like most laptops my camera is at the top of the screen. Its field of view is limited and quite often doesn’t even show my face. I actually took a snapshot using the camera a few seconds ago –
That is the top of my head, bottom just to the right of centre. I often tilt the screen back a bit for no reason whatsoever. Best of luck identifying me from that! You may admire the beams in the ceiling though.
It did cross my mind that he is claiming to have watched me having a wank. That’s just daft. Was I having a wank when I took the above picture? It would have been difficult as the laptop is on my lap. Anyway I wasn’t. You’ll just have to take my word on that.
Presumably there are blokes who fall for this scam? I just did some experimenting and to view the required area of action I would have to place the laptop on a table, stand a couple of feet away and then tilt the screen so I was looking down at a forty five degree angled screen. Not exactly conducive to immersive viewing?
Do people really fall for this scam?
I suppose though, as the saying goes: there’s one born every minute.
I think what he really meant was that he watched you having a timely doze, as per your last post. 🙂
Perhaps he is an insomniac, and was just a bit jealous?
Maybe he should try counting beams?
Been getting those daily for about two years now. If I’d really been wanking like that, I’d be a shrivelled husk by now!
Just the latest version of scams from Nigeria, I guess.
I get around twenty a day claiming I have undelivered parcels as well. Maybe vitamins and protein to keep up with all the wanking!
It does make you wonder, however, just how thick the senders are. Do they think ‘I’ll just send ten more today to everyone on my mailing list. That’ll make me seem more believable?’
Yes, I had a couple of those, not the numbers mentioned here, but the scammers did have an old password, so it was easy to change that!
What made me laugh, was that the idiot wanted the ‘money’ in something called ‘bitcoin’, which is certainly an item I’d never heard of, until I did a quick search, and am still none the wiser…
There’s one born every minute, but I was actually scammed – ‘legally’ so my bank said – on the DVLA website, where I thought I was re-taxing my car, but after a few days, found that it was another identical site dressed up as the DVLA!! I did complain and got my money back, but that really was a it of a bummer for a while!
People must be paying or they wouldn’t bother.
EMail is cheap. Pennies for thousand of emails. Even if just one payment in 100,000 is profit when you send out 2 million you have a business.
When I take over the universe, I’m slightly behind schedule, I will track these people down and fine then £1 per email and 1 day in jail per email. For every £ then don’t pay they get another day in jail. That would stop it.
“I prefer to watch videos of steam locomotives.”
Yah, me too. Nice ceiling by the way.