We have a health visitor who comes once a week on Tuesday at eleven sharp.
She’s a lovely person and we all get on like a house on fire. She has a great sense of humour and is very bright and breezy. The Missus and I have a little test we apply to friendships – could we spend a fortnight with the person in the confines of a caravan. The answer in this case is a [very rare] yes. This I might add is a purely hypothetical test as our caravan days are well over.
So we look forward to the visit, none more so than Penny. Penny is mad about her [it’s mutual] and she always brings a fistful of doggy treats. Penny will greet her at the gate and then go frantic with dancing squeals of joy as they come around to the back door. Mind you, when the visitor is leaving again, Penny will barely open an eye. Once she has received her treat she will lose all interest in you and you can fuck off and leave her alone.
Penny is a dog of simple habits. She likes fairly frequent trips to the garden where she will wander around the lawn, investigate the woods and maybe drop a landmine or two on the gravel driveway to catch the unwary. Once she has done her quiet rounds she will ask to come in to have another nap.
At half ten this morning she got all excited and jumpy and asked to go out. She vanished around the front of the house. I watched her on the security camera and there she was with her nose pressed against the front gate, waiting. I have seen her do this most weeks. Only on a Tuesday. Between half ten and a quarter to eleven. Every time.
How does she know?