I have mentioned in the past how I listen to the radio.
I don’t actually have a radio on, but Herself is in the next room and she loves the radio, so naturally I overhear it.
She has a choice of about 10,000 stations [it’s an Interwebs radio] but narrows her choice to about three. That’s fair enough.
Now there is a phenomenon that has crept into the world of radio, possibly many years ago but it’s only recently I have really become aware of it. I honestly don’t know whether it annoys or amuses me.
I refer of course to The Gabble.
An advertising break comes up and we get the usual singy songy voice extolling the virtues of some broadband service or a car or maybe some financial crowd. Now the advertisement is usually irritating enough, speaking at us as if we were ten years old [when has a ten tear old kid determined our choice of car, broadband or bank?] but at the end of the advertisement we get The Gabble.
The Gabble is the audio equivalent of small print. It’s all the exclusions, terms and conditions which they are now obliged by law to include in case any of us are dumb enough to fall for the ad. Now the advertiser is paying for their slot by the second, so they don’t want to waste precious air time telling us stuff that more than likely nullifies the bilge they are trying to sell and certainly limits its appeal so they hire someone to read The Gabble at breakneck speed.
The Gabble is really quite clever. They manage to fit about three paragraphs into about two seconds and if you listen very carefully you can actually make out individual words. The problem is that the words come so thick and fast that you haven’t time for your brain to process the meaning. This is the clever bit. No one can possibly make out what The Gabble is saying, but if you try and prosecute the advertiser they can legitimately claim that they did include the information and if you are too dim to understand it, then that’s your problem.
There are obviously people who are hired on the basis of how fast they can talk without actually tripping over their words.
I just wonder if that’s the way they normally speak?