I am who I say I am
I think I have just completed a quest I have been meaning to undertake for a long time.
It involves solicitors and frankly they are a breed I would rather avoid.
It’s not that I have had any bad experiences with them in the past; in fact the opposite is true. They were very helpful [and cheerful] in my last Circuit Court defence where I was cleared of all charges. A different firm handled things expertly when it came to an inheritance. What I have against them is that they are so fucking complicated and legal.
My latest problem such as it was, was down to our local solicitor retiring. I got a very nice letter from her announcing the fact and that all my documents had been passed on to another firm fucking miles away. I had never heard of them but apparently they now hold my Wills and far more important, the Deeds to The Manor. I don’t like having someone I have never heard of in a distant town holding such important shit so I decided to move them [the documents, not the solicitors], unless of course they have been lost.
I contacted a local solicitor. I got a very cheerful email in return saying that there was no problem whatsoever. Of course they would request that my file be repatriated in the village. All I had to do is prove I am who I say I am. This is apparently a legal requirement.
Now this isn’t as simple as you would imagine. A photo identity is required. That’s no problem as I have a driving licence, even if the photograph on it makes me look like I hang around outside a girls’ school with a dirty mackintosh on. Herself is a different kettle of frogs however. No licences or anything like that. To complicate matters she hates any photograph of herself lying around and will tear ’em up if she finds one. She’s weird like that.
I eventually found an old identity card that would have to do. I scanned both cards.
But then they want proof of address. Just photograph a bill says they. That’s all very well but I don’t get any bills any more. All my regular stuff is either paid by standing order of by the Credit Union and all I get is an email which proves nothing [as any scammer will tell you].
Finally I got a bill. Well, it wasn’t really a bill, it was a nice cheerful letter from Revenue about Property Tax. I scanned it before tearing it up and burning it so I hope the scan will suffice. If it doesn’t, I’m back to square one.
This morning I finally sent off a whole bunch of attached files which will probably clog up the local Interweb.
I may not like ’em as a breed but they are handy to have around.
Just in case.
Things seem to get a tad more complicated every year.
When are they going to realise that we have entered an era where bills as proof of identity are increasingly rare? I can’t remember when I last got one, it’s so long ago.
This would be ok if they would accept junk mail as proof. I get bunches of that crap every week.
I get very little junk through the letterbox. All mine is electronic. I have just received a mail from our post office to say they have a parcel for me and all I have to do is click on the provided link and pay â¬2.99. Gone Phishing!!!!
Of the old fashioned mail we get half of it is junk, and most of those are credit card offers. I have taken advantage of the postage paid envelopes they provide to reply “Oh hell no, leave me the fuck alone”. After all, they paid the postage. Not to mention paying some poor soul in the basement to open the incoming crap, sort it, and then route it. (Or most likely in my case, to trash it.)
Our somewhat recent experience with one (for that ongoing trouble with a neighbour awhile back) gave me just another reason to avoid them at all (lack of) costs. When one of them states that they get $$$ an hour billed every 6 minutes–I still don’t know what that means–including charging extra for every phone call no matter how short, it made me a more than bit nervous about our financial situation. We did save some by doing all the footwork ourselves that he would have had to do otherwise. I couldn’t imagine what he would have charged us for driving around back roads all afternoon.
I presume your solicitor has gone decimal? 6 minutes = 0.1 hours?
I did get a mail from my lot giving an a la carte menu. Over $400 to write a will. Luckily we did that years ago and there’s no need to change it unless we have more children….
“unless we have more childrenâ¦.”
Well grandad, one of these times if the cap doesn’t go back on the Jameson’s bottle early enough…
If you do, have more children I mean, I’m going to contact the Guinness World Records office about it. Perhaps you could make it into the next edition?
He could also be contacted by The National Enquirer.
Yes Irish solicitors, efficient and manage to keep a sense of humour to boot.
At long last the dealings with some land in the family back in Clare has been cleared up and put to bed, its only taken around 55 years.
I was a nipper when my mother and my uncle would be discussing this land in hushed tones, and following the death of my mother some 17 years ago things fell to us children, who knew the sweet FA about any of it and its been a nightmare with each of us dreading a letter or email arriving.
At last its over, and my sister cousins and myself are all pleased it’s finally over, in our lifetimes too, none of us wanted it to fall to our children who would be even more clueless than we’ve been.
Hah! There are rumours that Herself may have inherited some land in Clare, but no one seems to know where exactly it is. It would probably cost ten times the value of the land to find out. We’re not going down that road. What is it about Clare anyway? Should they just divide the county amongst the population?
By all means leave well enough alone on that one. Someone will show up at the door with a bill for thirty years back taxes.
Don’t know if Ireland was the same as the UK, but we used to have solicitors acting as ‘Commissioners of Oaths’ In effect, to prove your identity, you sat across a desk from any solicitor (he didn’t need to know you), a desk upon which sat a bible, you then ‘swore’ who you were (unsupported by any ID documentation), at which point the solicitor then certified your identity and charged you a shilling.
A tad insecure perhaps, placing its entire reliance on the implied fear of the consequences of lying over a bible, but it was far simpler than now.
I had never heard of this, but it doesn’t surprise me one bit.