The Final Solution
I am getting rather tired of this Climate Change lark.
Every so often they come up with startling warnings about how the world is in imminent danger and we only have X number of days to save the planet.
Of course they always show us the world’s last remaining Polar Bear standing on what’s left of the North Pole.
Now of course they could remove all road traffic from the world, but then how would we get around so easily?
What about all those ships all pumping diesel fumes into the atmosphere? But if we banned them we wouldn’t have any goods.
It has been suggested that we ban flying, but then how would the Skangers go on their holliers to Benidorm? They did actually try that a couple of times, once in America in late 2001 and again in Europe when that Icelandic volcano [with the unpronounceable name] burped, but neither had much effect on the climate.
There is an answer. It is amazingly simple. Furthermore it costs nothing [none of those shitty taxes]. Everyone can do it and I can absolutely guarantee it will end all fear of climate catastrophe.
I estimate that this very simple technique will remove around 5 trillion litres of Carbon Dioxide from the atmosphere. Yes – 5 trillion, not 5 million or 5 billion but 5 trillion.
All you have to do is to stop breathing for ten minutes. It is that simple. If everyone on the planet does it we will reach the magic number. A plastic bag to place over your head is the only requirement, to prevent cheating.
I can guarantee you will never worry about the climate again.
The polar bear picture was staged, as I’m sure you know. There are more polar bears today (than during August every year this century) – when will these climate doomsayers stop lying?
They’ll never stop once there’s vast fortunes to be made.
In the annals of history, you will surely go down as one of the world’s greatest philosophers. Who knew? Oh, wait. Scratch that annals stuff.
Maybe I should write the annals first? And this site will presumably still be around?
Grandad, you just found the solution to climate change, covid, all other bio threats, animal liberation, world hunger, the threat from nuclear annihilation, smoking, alcoholism and many other things that I can’t quite remember at the mo.
Isn’t it amazing how a simple ten minutes can solve every problem known to man?
Alternatively when you are flying off to stay in some nice hotel be sure to make some comment about the weather over dinner.
“Phew! What a scorcher at the beach today. Had to take a dip in the lovely lukewarm sea every half hour.
And, lo, you are at a climate conference and your emissions have no effect.
Maybe I could have worded that last sentence better.
The only snag is that you will have to pay for your own attendance at your conference.
However you will be immune to the WuFlu. And you will be ushered past all immigration inconveniences.
“you will have to pay for your own attendance at your conference“. Have you never heard of Expense Accounts?
A few things caught my eye over the last few days.
First the 12 Irish MEPs are costing the taxpayer Euro 24 million a year.
Second they now want to bring in Green taxes having the last two years destroying jobs,small-business and talking peoples freedom away. All this while China and India the worlds biggest polluters get a free pass.
Why do people keep voting for these clowns?
In defence of our Irish friends, they don’t get a choice of a non-clown, they’ll all clowns, just wearing different make-up.
But if the voters don’t vote for any of the clowns, that suggests they don’t care anyway, so the clowns can behave even worse. That’s democracy for you – when all the candidates are self-selected clowns, where can you turn?
:…where can you turn?..
Pointy-ended sticks, ropes & lamp-posts?
The cars in that picture are all driving on the wrong side of the road!
That’s Americans for you – they can’t do anything right,
How about this. Is this better?
Plastic bags? You planet destroying cad, you!
I’ll hold my breath when I’m dead. (What else did you expect me to say?)