Hello Grandad. How are you? As if I didn’t know already.
Now don’t start wrecking my head with this ‘know it all’ stuff!
Fair enough. What can I do for you?
Well, I was just wondering, what with you knowing everything and all, if you can tell me when all the madness on Earth is going to end? Frankly I’m a bit pissed off with the whole state of affairs.
Well, Grandad, can I make a little confession?
What? God confessing to me? That’s a bit weird?
Well, as you just said times are indeed strange. Anyway, you know how I am omnipotent and know absolutely everything?
That’s a drop of tautology, but yes?
Well I confess I don’t know what has happened on Earth. I have lost control of it and even I don’t know what’s going on. It hasn’t happened before in the history of the Universe. I’m stumped.
So what are you going to do about it?
There’s only one answer. I’ll have to either do a restore or a reboot. I just can’t decide whether to restore Earth back to the last Ice Age, or whether it would be better to do a complete reset and start again with the Big Bang. Have you a preference?