I had the misfortune to see part of a television programme last night.
It was one of those “around the country” programmes where they do items at various locations. For some reason the only thing people seem to do in Irish villages is arts or crafts, but that’s beside the point.
Last night they focused on a wee village in West Cork where a primary school has apparently produced a “rap” thing about “climate change” which has gone “viral”.
Now there were a few things that pissed me off about this. There is that “viral” thing which apparently means more that their immediate families have watched it. Then there is the whole insidious thing about brainwashing infants [they seemed to range in ages from around five to nine] about the climate and terrifying them into having nightmares.
The worst part about it though was the “rap”.
I know it’s traditional for us olders to moan about the younger generation’s choice of music. I’m sure my parents silently cursed the Beatles, the Stones, the Who and all the rest of them but I stand by my position that there was some damned good music there.
That is not fucking music! It’s a bunch of kids reciting lyrics [full of slang] while jiggling around on a fixed spot and poking their fingers in random directions. This recitation is produced on a monotonous drone preferably with a Bronx accent and with an accompanying raucous beat that never changes. It is reminiscent of some of my worst hangovers.
I have heard that the lyrics are supposed to be some sort of modern poetry but I don’t go for that. Proper poetry can be music to the ears [if you go for that sort of thing] but rap is just rapid-fire words where the occasional word rhymes.
Music in my book consists of melodies, preferably with harmonies. Those are completely non-existent in rap. It’s just an electronically produced beat that throbs around the head like a bad toothache.
So maybe I’m an old fart who can’t keep up with modern trends. Maybe there are people who will disagree with me. Maybe I am missing something.
I don’t care.
Rap is utter shite.