A judge in California is insisting that cancer warnings be placed on all servings of coffee.
Oh dear. That will put the feline amongst our avian friends?
I am a bit baffled by this new “coffee culture”. In my day there was black coffee, or if you put a drop of milk in it it became a white coffee. Unambiguous and simple. Now you go into a café and the menu for coffees is usually longer than the menu for food. There are all these mochas, cappuccinos, lattes, americanos, skinny lattes, espressos and a host of others. What the fuck is all that about?
I saw an advertisement recently where a shop in the area wanted to hire a “coffee barista”. I had to look it up. Apparently it’s someone whose sole function is to serve coffee. I even discovered a Barista School that hands out certificates! Are they seriously saying that you need a fucking school were you learn how to make a cup of coffee? Give me strength! God be with the days when, if you asked for coffee they’d stick a spoon of Nescafé powder in a cup and pour in boiling water.
I can imagine the Mammies will be proud. They can now brag to their friends [at a coffee morning?] that their offspring is a qualified barista, and hope that the friends will think she said barrister?
There is a whole new “culture” now. Fucking coffee shops are everywhere and it is almost compulsory to be seen in them. You score extra points for demanding a variation that the “barista” hasn’t come across before. And of course it is mandatory to carry a great big paper cup in the street at all times.
I’m not a great one for coffee. I enjoy a mug down in the village but that’s more a social thing than a love for the stuff. I used to ask just for a “large black” but now they just ask me if I want my usual. That’s the way the world should be – nice and simple. I do have a machine in the house but it’s mainly for visitors, and I get loads of compliments. My menu is short and sweet – black, white or frothy white.
So how this “coffee culture” is going to cope with dirty great cancer warnings is anyone’s guess. I imagine that a lot of members of the “coffee culture” are also card carrying members of the Church of Health so it is going to cause a lot of anguish and grief, not to mention a lot of confusion.
Do I hear howls of anguish in the air?