Being all at sea — 15 Comments

  1. Hi G.D.

    Might just be worth mentioning to them that it’s YOUR money that you are lending to them .

    Find that banks tend to forget that fact .

    • Not only that but they probably charge me for answering the phone, printing off a statement, the cost of an envelope and stamp, and an overall “administration fee” on top of all the interest I pay ’em.

  2. “.  Our navigation system never coped with these conditions before and the radar blew overboard some time ago.”

    *1950 BBC voice (Miss.Ovaltine)*

    Ooh we know a song about this one, don’t we Boys & Girls? Now follow the dot on the screen and lets sing those nasty old black clouds away:

    ♫Like a drunken sailor in a tugboat
    With a bottle of vodka in my overcoat
    & my dog eared bible lost–overboard♫

    • ♫ On the good ship Venus

      By Christ you should have seen us

      The figurehead was a whore in bed

      Sucking a dead man’s …… ♫  [Can’t remember the rest]

  3. Always knew it as ” And the Figurehead was a Nude Mermaid, Sucking a dead man’s …..”

    It’d have to be a damned wide prow to get a carving of a ‘whore in bed’ on it. Wonder if it was a single or double bed?

    • Mermaid doesn’t rhyme very well with Figurehead?  I also heard “the figurehead was a maid in bed sucking a dead man’s….”  There seems to be quite a few variations?  The power of Chinese Whispers!

    • They’re all the same – Social Welfare, Income Tax – all make it as easy as possible to take money off you, and as difficult as possible to get any back.

  4. Probably depends on which version of the song. AFAIK the Sex Pistols’ version was:

    It was on the good ship Venus
    By Christ, ya shoulda seen us
    The figurehead was a whore in bed
    And the mast was a mammoth penis


    But the song itself predates Mr. Sidney Vicious…perhaps by a couple of centuries even, as always Wiki is our friend:


    • So that’s what the last word is!  I have been racking my brain all day trying to remember.  Along with everyone else, apparently.

  5. “Frigging in the rigging,”

    “Wanking on the planking,”

    “Frigging iiiinnn the rigging!”

    “There was…. else to do.”  And here memory fails me.

    • Statutory bank holiday here.  Several months have bank holidays on the 31st.  February has two – 30th and 31st.

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