The drought is finally over.
Some say it’s the longest drought since records began, having been running for nearly two weeks.
Anyways, yesterday I called into the shop and asked if my Condor had arrived, and they apologised and said it was definitely on order and should be in the next day. Now I have been hearing that for the duration of the drought and went home feeling somewhat despondent.
Naturally in my despondency, I had forgotten to buy fags for Herself so I had to go out again. Herself with no fags is not a wonder you would wish to behold.
This time I went to Local Shop and asked for her stash. “Do you want your Condor as well?” says the young lad behind the counter [They know me well].
Fuck me but there it was – a new supply of Condor. Manna from Heaven! The drought is over!
Rumour had had it that the delay was caused by their having to make new 30g packs to satisfy those cunts in Tobacco Control, but the new supply was the same old 25g size. However, they have changed the design and this is presumably the cause of the absence.
Now the question is whether this is the new “plain pack” or not. The back of the pack is equally plastered with more porn and more dire warnings, but if this is as far as they are going then I am more than happy as I can still see clearly which brand I am getting and can also pick it out at a distance. What’s more, I think a little splash of colour to add to the green enhances the appearance somewhat?
Anyhows, I expressed delight that the packs were in and said I was even more pleased that they were using my favourite image, even though they seem to have gotten the mistaken impression that a pipe should look like a cigarette.
The lad behind the counter wasn’t so sure though. He pulled out another pack that showed a dismembered limb or something and asked if that didn’t put me off. I told him that it didn’t bother me in the least. After all, I have been ignoring the images for years and a change in size is hardly going to make me step back in horror.
Do they honestly expect me to recoil in shock at a picture of an infant smoking pipe tobacco in a cigarette stuck in a soother?
If that’s their idea of something persuasive then they really are living in their own little fantasy land.