Flash bug — 16 Comments

  1. How strange. You’ve not been watching UK Breakfast TV by any chance? Listened too long  to Irish , or any other, politicians ? Sounds to me like one of those Blitz or 24 Hour Flus that everyone knows can only be cured by the drinking of hot whiskey toddies to sweat out the evil. Either that or your malaria has flared up again (and there I’m not quite joking, there is something called ‘bog flu’).

    • Breakfast television???  You must be joking.  The box rarely gets switched on before five to seven so I can watch the weather forecast.  To be honest I wouldn’t switch it on at all except Herself likes it.

      I confess I am at a loss to understand this “hot whiskey” lark.  It’s just a good tipple destroyed.  Cold whiskey is fine though and I may ave several thi evening just to ward off any potential return of the bug.

      • Let me , in my role as ex-professional alcoholic, assure you that while that ‘good tipple’ destroyed’ may seem like sacrilege it is expressly permitted under the Rules Of Engagement when dealing with all manner of lurgy. In my experience cold neat whiskey doesn’t make you sweat the way hot will . So be a man, hold your nose and throw it down your throat, you can always have a cold one straight after to take the taste away. Did your Mother no tell you a ‘spoon full of Jamesons….makes the warm lidl’s scotch go down’?

    • For me, the malaria only ever manifests itself when I’m really ill – a rare event. It returned when I came down with glandular fever when I was in my twenties, and it came upon me with a vengeance when I caught mumps (don’t ask – even the doctor winced when he saw the size of my left testicle. I did, however, go on to sire two daughters after, so it wasn’t terminal) from my son when I was in my thirties. Doc couldn’t understand why I was running such a high fever; then he had a light-bulb moment, and asked if I’d ever had malaria. But those are the only two occasions that it has returned to haunt me.

    • Ah Ger!  The C word?  In April?  Don’t like cloves anyway, but thanks for the suggestion.  I’ll stick with neat Jameson if that’s okay?

      • Jameson is good always. I just thought you might be going through a bout of post-Christmas blues. You could creatively substitute some other herbal substance for cloves. You could try any of the “warming” spices: Allspice, Pumpkin Pie spice, 5 spice powder, Cardamon, dry Ginger, Cinamon, Nutmeg.

        • True story; When I worked and lived Hessia I once came down with the Mother Of All Colds. A caring Hessian work colleague recommended hot ‘Acid Rain’ (the Hessian name for their national drink of ‘Apple wine’ which is a cider so astringent and strong it makes ‘scrumpy with added rat’ look like an improvement) with one of the ‘Gluehwein’ teabags to flavour it and impart herbal goodness to it. I was to drink several hot pints of this ‘Gluehapfelwein’ then strip naked and wrap myself in a thick woolen blanket (at home that evening not at work I hasten to add). When I awoke in the morning I was light headed and new-born-kitten weak BUT the cold was gone.

          • When I was a lad, and in Somerset learning how to get leglessly, incoherently drunk in as short a time as possible on the local scrumpy, I was told that the farmers would throw a leg of mutton (raw) into the fermenting vat ‘to give it body’. How true that is, I’ve no idea – I suspect it may be that a touch of poetic licence crept into the tale. Although on second thoughts, perhaps not.

            • Probably not so apocryphal as it happens, there used to be quite a craze for adding various meats to various brews. There was a famous ‘Cock Ale’ with real…..chicken (what did you think?!).  From my brewing theory days I believe there is actually a good reason for it, however weird it might sound but I can’t recall now what rotting meat added to the nutrient mix of the vat , probably salmonella. 

              And then of course for the more politically aware modern drinker and comic reader there is always the idea of ‘Ebola Cola’….cuts the cloying sweetness I believe.

        • You could creatively substitute some other herbal substance for cloves.

          I would suggest that a good herbal substitute would be Chartreuse Green. At 55% ABV, it works very well as a herbal substitute. I have a bottle on the shelf opposite. For purely medicinal purposes, of course. I have to admit, despite several years as a cocktail barman, I’ve never tried combining it with Jameson. I’ve got a bottle of that as well – maybe I’ll give it a try. If I survive, I’ll report back.

          • Chartreuse Green.

            One of those drinks where the back story makes up for the taste. Almost. Like Benny’s Dick Teen or whatever it’s called, the French Buckfast (and i say that as a former ‘Sinthe man myself).

  2. I thought you were about to reveal yet another bug in the Flash program! (Which is already enrolled in the Hall of Infamy.)

    On the other hand, assuming TBD wasn’t joking when he mentioned malaria, it could well’ve been that. Many years ago, despite taking prophylactics, I succumbed to malaria. Ever since, when I’m at a particularly low ebb, I get a brief resurgence of the symptoms. Luckily, it’s a rare occurrence and only short-lived.

    • I don’t ever recall being exposed to Malaria, but I do have a strange theory about Glandular Fever which I had many years ago.  A lot of these strange little outbursts bear a resembance to the GF, so maybe it’s still there lurking in the pits and popping its hed up every now and then.

      That little “flash bug” was the worst I have had in decades, at the very least since I left work back at the turn of the Millennium.  All I usually get these days are passing sniffles.  I blame the Grandkids for those.

  3. Sorry to be logical about this, but you can’t beat a good antipyretic such as ibuprofen, and it helps with the aches too. 


    • Welcome CD13.  Logic occasionally [though not too often] makes its way onto these pages.  I tnd to avoid manufactured chemicals where possible as they can fuck up your life quicker than a Scientoogist.  Half my daily input of pills are there to try to undo the damage caused by the other half.

      Anyway, life is completely back to normal.  I had a partial relapse last night but it only lasted a very short while.  I can officially say that my bug [whatever the fuck it was] has done its worst and gone.

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