Obesity is caused by Big Tobacco

Donal O'Sea is Ireland's "top obesity expert".

Apparently.

So being a type of doctor who specialises in obesity one would expect him to see a lot more obese people than the rest of us?  And seeing a hell of a lot of obese people he naturally assumes we are all porkers.  It's a bit like the car mechanic who assumes that every car on the road is dodgy because the only cars he works on are dodgy.

Anyhows, the Prof is worried to the point of distraction.  His first patient of the year weighed in at an impressive 40 stone.  One point in his favour is at least he sticks to old money – I can never get the hang of that Kilos crap.  This 40 stoner then set the standard for the rest of the year and now SOMETHING MUST BE DONE.

Yes – the dear Prof is off on a rant about obesity and how it kills 4,000 people a year.  The gubmint is as guilty of child abuse as the Vatican and our "National Heroes", the Robbie Keanes, the Brian O' Driscolls [whoever they are], are apparently all but killing people outright.  Obesity should be treated like a Foot and Mouth emergency [though I’m not sure how driving over mats soaked in disinfectant is going to slim people down?  A newly discovered treatment?]. In fact he blames everyone from Rosanna Davison, through the Working Classes to Santa Clause.  In fairness to the Prof, he believes in spreading the blame a bit.

However, the Prof has realised that if you have an "epidemic" you must have some single industry to blame.  There has to be a Big Something that is callously exploiting our precious cheeeeeldren for their own gains.  Our Prof has decided to go for the jugular and is blaming Big Tobacco.

Yes, amongst others, Big Tobacco is behind our obesity epidemic –

Prof O'Shea says the food and drink industry, which is "predominantly owned by the same people who own the cigarette companies" are using inventive strategies to grow their base of "heavy users", despite knowing the untold damage they are doing to the nation's health.

So there you have it.  Big Tobacco is the cause of it all.  Presumably they are also off buying up salt mines, sugar factories and the McDonald's franchise?

The little scamps.

UPDATE

I have since learned from a reliable source that apparently the Prof isn't so anti-tobacco as I first thought.  In fact he seems to think the greatest threat to national health and not tobacco and is actually a bit  miffed that tobacco is constantly grabbling the limelight, which makes a change.  Or so I am told.

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Comments

Obesity is caused by Big Tobacco — 14 Comments

  1. And e-cigarettes can cause folk to just fade away to nothing.
    (A token comment as requested. Hope it helps.)
     

  2. Hilarious absolutely hilarious…gastric band my arse just stop feeding the fuckers and their obesity will disappear all by itself but then again the prof and his ilk won;t be raking it in any more and that will never ddo…surely it's time for all vending machines to have ciggie type sliding doors over them so the punter has to take pot luck when he sticks his euro in…it always amazes just how accurate those who can see into the future are with their predictions…

     

    With Ireland firmly on track to become the fattest nation in Europe by 2030,

    • They just love their little league tables, don't they?  When it comes to health we always have to be the first, the fattest or the most rigorous.  To me, "on track" means "hopefully to achieve" so maybe he wants us to top the league?  That way he can have something to brag to his foreign pals about?

  3. And I always understood that smoking keeps one thin.   

    Must be the new science; similar to the claim of warble gloaming is due to CO2 when there has been a plateau in temperature for nearly 20 years, although the CO2 has been steadily increasing.

    • Somewhere a while ago I saw some "expert" claiming that part of the root cause of the modern "obesity epidemic" was down to the reduction in smoking rates.  At least there is a certain logic to that!  It's the old story – be careful what you wish for…….
       

  4. Never having been overweight in my life I stopped smoking for three months and gained 12 lbs. I went back to smoking fast. Other thing that puzzles me is these grotesquely fat people, like the woman who recently needed a crane and the removal of the front of her house to get her out, as they are bed bound who is feeling them all this 'junk' food? Isn't that tantamount to murder? 

  5. Obesity is caused big tobacco?

    When I first started smoking I weighed in around 150 lbs (don't know about them "stones" except I once had to haul them out of the fields every spring) and when I finally quit 26 years later I weighed all of 155 lbs. Considering I'm just shy of 6 foot tall that was actually a welcome increase. This also included eating a fair amount of "fast food" and drinking of beer as well.

    Okay, so I actually gained weight during the time I smoked, ate fast food and frank beer. All of 5 lbs or so. And this is the fault of big tobacco? I think it's more the fault of growing old(er).

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