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Ban them — 18 Comments

    • That is just a illusion put out by Big Phone.  You are in fact in Ward 8 of San Francisco Maximum Security Home for the Bewildered.

  1. I found out that if I open the icon marked 'Phone' and go to 'number pad' and type in the correct combination of numbers I can make a phone call.  I bet that's why they call them "SmartPHONES".

     

    • You'd better start shouting that out as not many people seem to be aware of that?  Incidentally, is your device connected to the wall with a wire?  If not then it is one of the deadly microwave versions which means it's already too late to phone for help.  Mind you, phoning for help will probably kill you with the radiation anyway.

  2. After years of addiction leading to "Phone-wrist" in both hands, I am not longer able to work, eat alone, smoke or masturbate. My quality of life has been shattered by these insidious things and I call on Governments everywhere to immediately ban their use and possession. Centres must be opened and an amnesty given for a short period allowing users to hand over their devices for destruction. Then a nationwide dragnet must be done to catch the hard-core offenders who refuse to comply. I also helpfully suggest a €3,000 fine for a first offense and €6,000 fine for the phone makers and service providers.

    • Amnesty?  Why?  Phone addicts are already killing us left right and centre so it's time for immediate action.

      Incidentally, I'm forming an action group and will be looking for gubmint funding.  Interested in joining?  I believe there's tons of cash to be had…..

      • Let's have a few pints and smokes and kick around the idea. Over steaks later we could work on a name for it. Naturally we'll register as a charity because income and expenditure will be tax-free . I'm thinking "Action of phoning and texting" or APT, (as in appointed to speak on the topic). I have a friend who works in a garage and he says he'll supply us with a whole pile of bogus figures to back up any wild claim we want to make and he says it will all sound scientific too. Then all we have to worry about is what size six-figure sum we pay ourselves!!

  3. Excellent! I'm still laughing. And so truthful too!

    I'm sharing this post if you don't mind. The word must get out.

    • I don't mind.  If it saves even one life from the evil clutches of Big Phone then my job is worthwhile.

  4. I'm glad you did share it Kirk. I haven't been to Grandad's site in a while and I would have hated to miss this shocking new data on the risks of mobile phones. 😉 

    • Welcome back Denise!  This site is where it's all happening at the moment. Ignore it at your peril.

    • Heh, Grandad's always good at digging out the truth as he sees it. Usually it's worth paying attention to.

  5. Good. I hope you'll soon read New Research Findings about the social and dietary implications of spreading use of pop-up toasters. Governments have got to do something drastic to halt the spread of pop-up toasters – and I don't mean by putting higher rates of VAT on them.

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