Scientists have discovered what makes a person into a "binge drinker".
Apparently it's down to "a large number of factors, including brain function, personality, life experiences and genetics".
This is groundbreaking stuff!
So nature and nurture are responsible? Next thing they will be saying that a large number of factors, including brain function, personality, life experiences and genetics can predict just about anyone's future?
Could it be that a large number of factors, including brain function, personality, life experiences and genetics can determine if a child will become something useful, like a philosopher, an artist, a mathematician or an airline pilot?
And conversely could these same factors determine if a child will grow to become a waste of the planet's resources such as a politician, an anti-smoker or Garth Brooks?
I can just see those "researchers" standing over an unfortunate five year old –
Brain function? Check!
Personality? Difficult to be sure but we'll give the benefit of the doubt. Check!
Life experiences? Check!
Does he have genes? Check!
Yup. There is a chance this kid will grow to be a binge drinker. Mind you, the odds on him having three pints of beer on a single day some time in the next seventy years are fairly high so the odds are pretty good.
Now if they discovered that all "binge drinkers" had an extra vertebra, or an extra toe or that they were all born on a Tuesday, I would be more inclined to be impressed. As things stand, I'm not.
I'll give them an F for effort.