Yup. Tomorrow is the day we have been eagerly anticipating.
For tomorrow is that annual festival of the National Gang Rape, otherwise know as Budget Day.
Today is the day we all stock up on vast quantities of KY Jelly and Vaseline.
Tomorrow we grasp our ankles and try to convince ourselves that things could be worse.
One thing is certain.
In forty eight hours time I'm going to be a lot worse off.
And I probably won't be able to sit comfortably for months.
Keep a toilet roll in the fridge – just in case!!!
And several boxes of Kleenex….
Never mind the theft. What do you think of this?
Anyone who has ever seen a child's windmill-on-a-stick will see the science there at work. The problem is though that they have to make them with minimum drag or else the fucking things blow over! In other words, it's a technology that can never ever work efficiently.
There that took your mind off the theft for a minute or two.
Now watch this guy, found him today he's good.
Tomorrow the lefty Richard Barrett Brown will make mincemeat of the smoked salmon socialist Labour boys and girls. It's bangers and mash politics from now on in the key Dublin marginals.
I don't know about the mash, but I'm all for the bangers. And I don't mean sausages.
Halloween is coming soon. A time for magic and bangers imported from Northern Ireland. Then in England they celebrate Guy Fawkes with bonfires, bangers and rockets. Dennys can't be on your mind then?