Get smart — 22 Comments

  1. Hey Ganpa, leave out the bit about streaming your music from a server in your junk room via your Xbox, if you want to sound all technically clueless. ( could you post a guide possibly? – what's an Xbox? Would I get one in Woodies?) 

    • I'm just repeating the terminology used by the other fella when he set the thing up for me.  Apart from playing music, I haven't even a clue what the XBox does.  I got it as a present and still haven't worked it out.

  2. What the fuck is "TK 2 U L8R". ???


    I too have one of those tablet dispensers. A "must have" item in old age.

    • I have seen those letters at the bottom of text messages.  I assume they are some kind of computer code?

  3. The concept of a smart phone is to make the phone more intelligent then the operator. It does this by lowering the IQ of the operator. In many cases the amount the IQ has to be lowered is trivial. 

    • Damnation…  I missed that.  Brilliant link tough.  I see nitrogen was the gas du jour back in those days!  Leastwise our Global Warming enthusiasts should take some comfort from those predictions? 

  4. I suppose if you have two people with 'smart' phones and laptops in a home, that your 4 devices covered there GD.

    I still don't get the text speak myself.

    Got a text on the 18th – "Don c u out n y more. We rlly shud ave wnt all d way last tme" 
    I replied "who's this"?
    Got a reply on 21st "It's Kev".

    I really can't remember a Kev and thank fuck I didn't go all d way.. lol
    Probably a wrong number.

  5. "I can also assure you that none of them are remotely diamond shaped before you start on the wise cracks"

    Are viag-ra diamond shaped?   You learn something new every day….

  6. Can I please share the saddle on one of my regular and favourite rants?

    Text is a term for SMS – short messaging service.

    It is not a service for having a conversation but you may find that either your question will not be fully understood by the recipient or they may reply in the alternative and so a series of five or ten texts follow.My suggestions are never ever answer a text immediately (if texter wants answer they will call) and always use yes, no, answers only.

    It is a non-real-communication. It is an impersonal service and so so inappropriate for its regular use as 'How are you. Hope all is well'

    Conversation predates texting.

    With the power of the Vodafones, O2 and other multinationals, I am unwilling to bet which will outlast the  other.


    • What really baffles me is that most phones now have predictive text or even a QWERTY keyboard so there is no need whatsoever for "txt spk".  And what annoys me the most is when people use those abominable abbreviations in normal writing.  Just read through just about any on-line forum and you'll get tons of examples.

      • Unfortunately, with the providers charging the user per character nowadays, txt spk will be around for a long time yet. That is until the shooting starts anyway. It makes no sense though. Here in the states the providers charge more for sending a text message than yapping on the phone…I think. I don't actually own one as I'm too smart to need one–yet.

  7. hey! I speak English not's GREAT not G8 and yes I have a smart phone..but I also have a smart car so it breaks even

    • Aren't Smart Cars the ones that the lads in Amsterdam love tipping into the canals?  Heh!

    • Got an invite to join from MENSA many years ago.  I wrote to 'em and told 'em that anyone who had to pay to prove he was smart wasn't very smart.  Didn't hear from 'em again…..

  8. I heard that having only 4 devices that connect to the Internet is considered below average these days. I have 4 devices though–two old desktops and two old laptops. So I guess I'm average for below average?

    My wife and I have also noticed that 2 out of 3 younger people (meaning anyone under 45) passing by her store tend to walk into posts, parked cars and other pedestrians due to texting on their "smart" phones.

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