Hanging Angela Merkel — 11 Comments

  1. You should electrify them and use a zapper to get in and out.

    That way you could keep out the unwanted (and unwashed).

    • I fucking hate electronic gates, and refuse to visit any house that has them.

      On the other hand, if you mean wiring the latch to the mains …….. ?

  2. You'll think I am making this up but no……. there is a WD40 fan club!  You would be surprised what people use it for, I have heard people who use it to treat arthritis because it contains fish oils. My own personal favourite use is polishing the shower doors with it, cleans and prevents soap scum like nothing else.  Must try spraying it on a few politicians to see what it might do?

    • Jayzus but that's sad!  A fan club for a tin of spray?  So far the only thing I have found it good for is shifting twelve or thirteen years of rust.

      I'll try it on the next electoral candidate who calls anyway.  Just in case.

  3. Lot of myth talked about WD40. Not Green has two there. Good for arthritis?  No fucking way. Contains fish oil? No it don't.

      • Life is made up of myths, some true some not!  Here's a thought for the day – "You only need two tools in life, Duct Tape and  WD-40 .  If it’s not stuck and it’s supposed to be, Duct Tape it.  If it’s stuck and it’s not supposed to be,  WD-40  it.”

  4. At one house we had steel gates on brick pillars, which were part of a brick garden wall. But the gates went through periods when they couldn't be closed because they were too close and other times when they were so far apart the latch didn't work. After a few years I finally decided that it was dependent on the weather, in particular if the season was wet and the ground was saturated they went one way, if there was a long period of drought they went the other.

    As for WD40 it's magic stuff. Cleans up the sticky residue from adhesive labels, knocks wasps out of the air, dissolves oil and grease off the cooker better than any kitchen cleaner, polishes steel finishes, shifts rusted stuff and lubricates anything non-organic.

  5. Do up a big sign that reads, "Fuck off whoever you are," and hand it on the gate. People you want to see will be delighted at this typical piece of Grandad humour and the others will fuck off if they know what's good for 'em.

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