You have to laugh.
Over the weekend a bloke tried to break into the home of our esteemed minister for justice.
If ever you want to break into a minister’s house, the best time to do it is around Paddy’s Day because on that day all us taxpayers are treating our ministers to nice little trips abroad. Our justice minister just happens to be in Australia at the moment. Nice fucking job if you can get it?
Within minutes of the attempted break-in the unfortunate bloke was caught.
Whenever there is a break-in in this country there is usually an outcry of sublime indifferent silence. No one gives a shit because most people have suffered the same at one stage or other. The Gardai certainly don’t give a shit and when you attempt to report a breaking the reply is usually along the lines of “what the fuck do you expect us to do about it?”.
But we are talking about a minister’s home here. This is different. One of the Deity is involved. So immediately it is hot news, and within seconds of the attempt, the place is crawling with squad cars, and scene of crime officers. Doubtless the would-be-burglar will get six years in The Joy as that seems to be the standard sentence these days, whether you are a serial rapist or label garlic as apples.
Here at The Manor back in 2002 we had an attempted break-in. We came back from a shopping trip to find a damaged window and Sandy happily chewing on a fresh ankle-bone. I called the Gardai and reported the crime. They said they would send a squad car around.
We’re still waiting.