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Head Rambles Posted on by

This time next week I should be on the ferry to France.

If there is anyone out there travelling on that sailing, let me know and I’ll let you buy me a few pints.

I had sort of forgotten just how near the journey is so I’m at the stage now where I am trying to remember all the things I have to do.

Passports up to date?  Yup.

Ferry booked?  Yup.

Car insurance extended?  Just done.

Beam benders?  Yup, but not fitted yet.

High visibility waistcoat [required by law in France]? Yup.

Holiday accommodation booked?  Yup, but they made a fucking hames of it and double booked.  As a consolation, we were offered better accommodation in the same place and the same price.  I’ll even have my own private lake.  I’m not sure yet what I am going to do with a lake, but I’m sure I’ll find a use for it.

My problem now is that I know there is a load of things I have forgotten to do.  I started a list so that I wouldn’t forget anything.

Now I can’t find the fucking list.

 

Comments

Countdown — 19 Comments

  1. I think Carol Vauderwhatserbollux dresses in clothes that would flatter a girl 30 years junior toher. nice tits shame about the boat race.
    Just another “countdown” but this one made the FRONT FUCKING PAGE of a National newspaper.
    Bon Voyage Monsewer.

  2.  “I’m not sure yet what I am going to do with a lake,”

    You really do leave yourself wide open GD. Need I make it multiple choice ?

  3. Don’t foreget you will also need one of those reflective triangle things in case of a breakdown, if you don’t already have one that is.

  4. Patrick – What made the front page?  Carol Vordertits?

    TT – I have never had my own private lake before so it’s a bit of a novelty.  Sailing [if I had a boat]?  Fishing?  Skimming stones? Swimming [despite having a pool as well]?  Should I dam it?  Can I release it and flood the neighbourhood?  What’s the protocol with lakes?

    Sean – Good point.  Thanks.  I have one floating around somewhere.  And a fire extinguisher.  Though I could use the lake for putting out fires……

  5. Re reflective triangle
    Caution – Does it conforn to the new regulations ?
    Re High visibility waistcoat
    Put it in the car so that it is reachable from the driver’s seat, not in the boot under a mountain of luggage.    Again, does it conform to the new regulations ?
    I will leave my car in the garage whilst you are over here.    Pop in for a glass of wine, but telephone firstly.   I can then claim that I am out.

  6. Grandad,

    We have holidayed in France for the past 25 years and I am convinced those Hi-Vis vests are nothing to do with motoring but are in fact intended to protect money spending tourists from the lunatic chasseurs who each autumn stock up on cartridges at the hypermarche and shoot everything that moves.   If I were you I would make sure I wore Hi-Vis garments when going anywhere near that lake!

  7. Don’t forget yer spare bulb kit, it has been known that the French Police target RHD cars to check these things. Make sure your headlamp bulbs are ok too, you’d have to remove the front bumper of that yoke of yours to change a bulb!!

  8. what are beam benders?

    and i’ll be on a ferry in a week unfortunately, its the wrong ferry mines the argentia to newfoundland, be happy to buy you a few pints. 

  9. A Grandad – What new regulations?  Does the triangle have to have four sides?

    Not Green – Thanks!  Yup.  I forgot to remove them from the glove compartment, so they’re still there from the last trip.

    Cat – Beam benders are little lenses that are fixed to the headlights so they dip in the opposite direction.  Can’t go blinding any Frogs now, can I?  And for a moment, I thought you were getting a ferry from Argentina to Newfoundland!  That would be a trip and a half?

  10. Bon Voyage Grandad.
    I’m going to show my ignorance here, but I really have no idea what a high visibility waistcoat is. (Well, I can imagine, but I don’t know). Apparently I’ve been away from Europe for much too long!

  12. And you need to remember your EHIC.  Having an acute illness in France is much preferable to being on a trolley in Ireland

  13. Denise – A high visibility waistcoat is one of those bright yellow things with white stripes that all workmen seem to delight in wearing these days.  You are supposed to wear it if your car breaks down and you have to wander around the road.  I always wear mine when cutting the grass outside on the road – makes all the speeding cars think I’m a speed trap!

    Ian – I have the EHIC cards, and thanks for reminding me earlier…..  must pack the rifle.

  14. Thanks for the safety equipment information. It is nice to know what our idiocrats will be importing.

    We just got our lighted numbers so that our fire department can find our burning house at night. Do you have yours yet?

  15. Ramrod – Hah!  That conjures up a lovely picture.  While flames leap thirty feet in the air, the Fire Department crawl along outside looking for the right number.  We don’t bother with numbers here in the wolds.  The address is house name followed by townland and then the village.  The postman knows where to find us, but the rest get lost.  Perfect peace!

  16. Our lighted numbers has already CAUSED one death in our village. When the Fire Dept. was passing out the solar-powered numbers that were paid for with Obama money from Homeland Security, one startled old man came to his door with a gun. The emergency response police killed a 67-year-old Vietnam veteran.

  17. Ramrod – Well, you will insist on having guns lying everywhere….

    AG – Thanks for that link.  I have only just found it as somehow you had ended up as spam.  Yup.  Have all the list bar a HiViz vest for Herself.

  18. We could use some more guns. Look at what the brave people in Muslim countries have recently accomplished.
    Democracy doesn’t work.

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