Truth and lies
I wasn’t going to bother my arse writing anything today.
It’s too hot and sticky and I am knackered after two days work in the fields. Anyway I had nothing of interest to write about.
A few minutes ago I browsed the Interweb.
Fuck!
Some of you may not be aware of this [and Tinman obviously isn’t] but I fucking HATE memes. I don’t know why. I just do.
In this particular case, I am asked to give seven random facts about myself. Now, I might find it interesting to read random facts about other people, but I would find it exceptionally boring to read seven random facts about myself.
I am not going to do it.
As the Americans would say – no fucking way.
Instead I am going to give one random fact and pat it out with six random lies.
1. I am not a grandfather. I am in fact called Julie. I am twenty six years old and I live in Staines in Middlesex.
2. I have a star named after me. [a real star; not one of those Hollywood fuckwits]
3. I only have four toes on my right foot.
4. I have made an appearance on the BBC, ITV and RTE television channels for three unrelated reasons.
5. Twice, my life has been saved by the Lifeboat Service.
6. My middle name is Frances.
7. One of the above is not a lie.
You can guess away.
I may tell you later which one is true.
Or more likely I won’t.
I am now supposed to lumber 15 unfortunate souls with the same task. I don’t know 15 people who deserve such a dubious honour. By all means, if you want to have a bash, then feel free but you have to link back to me. Heh!
And for Tinman’s eyes only – You were supposed to write to me to warn me this was coming.
You didn’t.
Fail.
lets rule them out one at a time
1. your not 26, as for the rest of it …
2. The star went nova, no if you had said there was a nebula named after you.
3. Had me going on this one till I realized you said “right” foot instead of left.
4. You did appear on all three, but it was for the same incident at the pub.
5. The life boat service may make a mistake once, but surely not twice.
6. Logic would suggest that ruling out the first five means this on is true, but
7. You said you were giving us 1 true statement and 6 not true. If this is not true, then there is not another true answer. If it is true then there is more then one true answer.
Well now, but aren’t you the right smart one.
Damn! I was sure his name was Julie.
Eh Julie, I think the shrink might be in order for you too…. heh
Hmmm I had a very enjoyable night in 1984 with a ‘Mimi’. 🙂 Don’t give a merde what a meme is! We come here for a breath of fresh air on the interweb (figuratively speaking of course!) not to follow the other sheep!
Well knowing you this has to be your way of bragging about #4.
I know you do not live in Staines, Middlesex U.K., you are not nearly sad enough………
i couldn’t guess, i was flustered with the first few lines of blog,
I wasn’t going to bother my arse writing anything today.
It’s too hot and sticky
frankly (or francis as frances is female of the name) it was to much information about your arse and i was made queezy.
Brianf – I’ll change my name if you like?
Slab – I have been perfectly sane for the last four years and have the certificate to prove it.
Not green – I like Tinman’s style which is just as well – I would have told him to fuck off otherwise.
TT – Wrong. I missed out on one of them and only had a background scene.
Johnnyrvf – You have a point there. I have lots of stains though?
Cat – Whoops. Sorry. Do you want photos?
It’s perfectly obvious. Your Middle name IS Frances. If it wasn’t, why would you keep going there for you holliers. Case closed.
Hot and Sticky?! It was 39°C here yesterday! 🙂
Okay, we’ve got yer name now, Frances.
http://youtu.be/fPGq-N_6GM8
Paulo1 – Actually it’s not. Now if you said I went to France because of French ancestry?
JD – It’s still not. You are used to your heat. We only get a day like this about once or twice a year.
On a day when you couldn’t bother your arse writing about anything you got the fingers out and wrote much ado about nothing. Which is something. You’re like God: created something out of nothing. Mind you, I’ve said nothing. If you have nothing to say don’t say it. Stick to mental telepathy and the oul’ pipe.
Welcome Ger! I honestly wasn’t going to write anything but then Tinman posted and it would have been churlish to ignore him. Next time will be different!
Sorry, I notified about half the people, then had to go out and forgot who I hadn’t told.
You’re right – fail.
What happened to the missing toe?
As far as I am aware, they take all severed limbs [and bits of limbs] and use them to create clones of the original “owner”. It’s all done in the name of science of course.