There is a sub-set of the human species out there that leaves me completely baffled.
This sub-set goes about its business, reading the tabloids, backing horses, swilling lager and having illegitimate children, and I go about mine. Thankfully our paths rarely cross, but occasionally they do something that leaves me wondering at the sanity of the world.
For the last short while I have been seeing mentions of a thing called a super-injunction in the UK. Apparently this is a device to prevent anyone talking about a subject. By its nature, you don’t even know who has taken one out, or why. Now I could imagine the Windsors taking one out if one of their offspring had been caught shagging corgis or something, but beyond that I couldn’t see any justification for one.
Yesterday I read that Ryan Giggs took out a super-injunction to prevent the press writing about a ding-dong he has been having with Imogen Thomas. Or was it the other way around? Who cares?
Lets have a closer look at this.
First of all, if I have a secret, I shut the fuck up about it. I don’t go screaming from the rooftops that I have a secret and that I will sue anyone who talks about it.
The next point is Giggs. Who the fuck is he? He is a bloke who kicks a plastic ball around a field and gets paid obscene wads of cash for the privilege. What exactly is his contribution to society and the advancement of the human species? Sweet fuck all. Our bin man contributes more and probably gets paid in a lifetime what Giggs gets in a week. In other words, Giggs is a waste of space.
And what about the Thomas lass? I had never heard of her up to yesterday, but apparently her entire claim to fame is that she was once part of a fucking reality television programme. Is that the best she can do? Is this her entire claim to fame [apart from shagging Giggs]? Quite frankly both of them are a waste of oxygen and the world would be no worse off if they were both Raptured off to Deep Space.
What worries me is not that Giggs was porking Thomas or even that he got out an injunction to try to keep it a secret. No. What worries me is that people actually give a flying fuck. That sub-set of humanity actually gets itself in a tizzy over something that is a complete and utter non-event.
There are times when I despair.