The Silence of the Lambs
I had a very surreal experience today.
I had to go down to the village. There was nothing surreal about that, and Sandy drove beautifully, as she always does.
I dropped into the pub to buy some tobacco, and to have a chat with Pullit, as one does. We stood and batted the breeze and looked out the window.
It was then I saw them.
There was a group of about six in front of the grocery shop. They were obviously tourists, as they all had massive cameras around their necks. But they were just standing there, like sheep. Every now and then, one would raise a camera and photograph nothing in particular.
After I left the pub, I realised there were a whole lot more. I would say there were around two dozen in all, and they were all just standing silently and photographing nothing. Have you ever seen “Children of the Damned”? It was a bit like that, only more hair raising.
I stood near a group to hear the accents, but no one said a word. They looked like your typical Americans – over fed and over here, but they were too quiet. Eerie.
I waited until another raised his camera, and I stood right in front of him to block his view. He never batted an eyelid, and just carried on staring through the viewfinder, with a glazed expression. There was a woman beside him who was very busy photographing the sky. Maybe they were Americans who had been trapped here by the airlines’ inability to fly through imaginary dust, and were just going through the motions until they could get home again? Who knows?
It was really scaring me at this stage, so I shot one just to see what the reaction would be. There was a reaction all right – they all came over and clustered around the body and photographed it, in total silence.
I admit I was really scared it this stage.
I got home as fast as the dog could drive me.
Wakey wakey! 4 in the afternoon – Sandy’s lickin your face! Oh, one guinness too many maybe!?
Surreal indeed. You went to the village with a gun? A loaded gun? Even more surreal you went to the pub and didn’t have a pint. I believe the mad yank stuff.
It is my professional opinion (St. James 1975) you are suffering from the effects of ash – not pipe tobacco ash. I believe you asked the dog to write the post – there is not a single ‘fuck’ in the post.
Standards are slipping, I’m afraid.
Mick – As God is my judge, and all that. I met our K8 on the way down and she can vouch for the veracity. If she doesn’t, I’ll kick her shins.
Kerry – Of course I carry a gun, and especially to the village. I have a reputation in the hunting fraternity to maintain. It was a bit early for a pint, so I just bought baccy. As for my language – I have to be careful not to offend my readers?
So that’s where all the conservative Democrats got to. I was wondering where they all went. Probably a few of the more disgruntled Republicans amongst them also I’d imagine. They’re semi-comatose state is fairly easy to explain though. They probably thought they could come over to Ireland and stir things up a bit but they found the government had more corruption running through it than they could ever hope to achieve which explains their silent somnolent state.
Thus, with their bridges burned behind them and no place in Ireland to call home, they’ve instinctively regressed to the final defense–playing the tourist. No worry though. They’ll soon start to disintegrate as there was nothing really holding them together in the first place except hate, anger and blind ignorance. There will be several piles of disintegration ash left over but I’m sure it will blow away with the breeze.
Just don’t try to fly through it. Disintegrated conservative ash might cause engine failure.
Kirk M – Certainly we must be amongst the world leaders when it comes to incompetence, corruption and cronyism. Maybe they came over for lessons? If I see any piles of ash at the side of the road in the next few days, I’ll know where it came from.
I hate it when the mind control experiments fail.
I know Mick is implying that I dreamt it or made it up, but that is exactly what it was like – a village full of zombies whose brains had been fried. It was very very strange.
Hilarious! I have actually had the same experience but it was in Germany and they were Italian Skiers!
I think I’d have fled the scene just as quickly ;0)
Welcome, Niall. My lot may have been Italian, but as they never said anything, I don’t know. It was very strange. Either they were on some drug or other, or else they were having withdrawals from some drug or other.