I swear it’s good
As regular readers of this wee column will know, I have been doing a lot of work over the last few days shifting this site around.
This operation has not escaped the attention of Herself.
“Will you please stop cursing,” says she.
“I will in my hole. Now please fuck off and leave me to my misery,” is my cheerful response.
“You’re swearing an awful lot these days,” says she.
“Am I? I don’t think I am,” I reply innocently. “Bollocks!” I roar as another huge file vanishes just as it was nearly downloaded.
“There you go again,” she mutters.
“AW FUCK!” I reply as a newly transferred site shows up as a blank screen instead of what I was expecting.
“Will you please stop. You’re frightening the guinea pig, and I have just had a complaint from the neighbours.”
“Fuck the guinea pig and the neighbours. I have my own fucking problems.”
“It’s not doing any good.”
“Oh yes it is” I reply with a smile. “Take a look at this.”
I sit back and relax for a minute as she reads. Another site has been transferred successfully.
“Fucking great,” I smile to myself.
Hi GD, if you want some new swear words, here are a few Dutch ones:
Sodamieter op! (Sod off..)
Pottverdikkema! (It’s supposed to be Gottverdikkema = ‘Fat God’, but gentlefolk complained so they changed the G to a P.
Gottverdomme! (God be damned…(nasty!)) Also changed to Pottverdomme for same reasons as above. Still, I did read on the news recently that the Irish gov. wants to bring in a new law against blasphemy(?) So maybe you’d better not..
The Dutch (I generally mix with) don’t care. ‘P’ottless lot.
.-= Geri Atric´s last brainfart .. ZWIJNPEST! =-.
Geri – I like foreign words but only when abusing someone. To call someone a dummkopf is satisfying as it usually confuses them. Expletives are a different matter though. ‘Merde’ doesn’t quite have the same impact as a good resounding ‘fuck’?
Sodamieter op? I must remember that one……..
Well fuckin’ A that was a good post with a fuckin’ good article attached in it.
Brianf – Could you moderate your language please? This is a family site.
I’ve always thought that cursing was an integral part of web design. You can’t get something to work, you let of a string of random swears, go make a cup of tea…come back and it’s all fixed 🙂
I can’t stop the swearing either. I taught children for 2 years and quit cold turkey because I was terrified they’d pick something up from me. Now that I no longer teacher, it’s nothing but f*cks and g*ddamns. The stars represent my lingering shame.
S Mum – Of course it is. It even has it’s own tags – <swear>bollocks</swear>. It makes things run faster.
Hiya Liv, and welcome. You taught swearing to children for two years? That is class [literally]. Incidentally, what the fuck are you doing moving to this hell-hole of a Godforsaken country? Are you mad?
Tell me about it. I’m driven fucking mad from fucking around with fucking websites.
For fucksake!
Bastards.
Bock – Did you just write that or did I? You aren’t The Other Fella by any chance?
No. I’m not the Other Fella, but I can understand his point of view.
Is this some strange kind of initiation thing that no one told us about?
Could be. Maybe THEY want us to suffer.
I love the way you said to Herself “I will in me hole”. The word “hole” isnt misused enough over here in Enger-land. I cant say “I’ve a pain in me hole with this” or “you can shove it up your hole”. As for “you will in your hole”….blank expressions all round.
Becky – One of the big problems with the Enger-lish is that they don’t know how to use their own language. It takes us Irish to teach ’em.
Nah – I think I’ll stay as sweet as I am – why would I want to be able to put my hands into ice cold water for any length of time anyway?
Grandad I nominate you to use my quota of bad language!!
Granny – I’m sorry!
Bad-language quotas. What a fucking great idea. Like carbon credits.
Well maybe you and Grandad could share mine then!!! I don’t know which of you need it the most!!!
I was actually thinking we have a surplus we could distribute to the fucking needy bastards.
Wow Bock!! You didn’t strike me as the charitable type!! Is it all a front then???
No. We’ll make the fucking bastards pay for our charity.
Fucking classic!! I love the idea of BLQs. I know a few old dears around here who’s quotas I can rob.
Next thing, you’ll be buying up Third-World BLQs and trading them on the international Cursing Market.