Of tablets and eyebrows
I donât know if I have explained this before, but here in the village we tend to ignore the outside world, especially when it comes to the Nanny State. Here, we believe that the individual really does know what is best for him or her. If someone is replacing tiles on our roof, we donât go mincing around wearing hard hats like some demented Duncan Stewart. If we want a quiet smoke in the pub, then that is up to Pullit. He owns the pub, and what he says, goes. If our kids go skateboarding and crack their elbows because they arenât wearing pads, then itâll teach them to be more careful in future.
Occasionally though, the outside world impinges on our tranquillity, and that is when I start to get pissed off.
The latest impingement is Mad Cow Harney and her plans to cut the subsidy payment to the pharmacies, as I have mentioned before.
I phoned our local pharmacy and asked what the story was, and to see if they were going on strike. They said they were and that from Saturday on, all medicines will have to be paid for in full.
I quietly explained to them that I was going away for a long time and would need all medications in advance, and could I collect two months supply in advance?
They said they were sorry, but they had to abide by the strike.
I reminded them what happened the last time Herself went without her medications, and they told me to call down straight away.
I had a grand chat up with the girl behind the counter while the pharmacist jiggled her tablets and played with her capsules in her private sanctum.
We were having a great old chat about France when another customer butted in. He looked vaguely familiar. There was something about those eyebrows? And for some unknown reason that awful fucking song âLady in Redâ started going through my head. Anyway, he butted in, as I said and assured me that it is more than hot over there, and that he knew this because he was just back from there himself. He annoyed me a bit, as I hate it when people see a celebrity and feel they have to butt in and pretend they know me.
The topic then turned to the government. We all agreed that they where hell bent on destroying the country and that they were certainly the worst government in Irelandâs history, and probably stood a good chance at the world title.
The girl behind the counter looked at us sweetly –
âThey should all be taken out and shot with balls of their own shiteâ she said.
Thereâs no answer to that.
Christy Burke was in your village?
Shite is a politicians natural element. They swim in it all the time. Now soap might cause them to dissolve or burst in flames. I also found it does matter what you shoot them with as long as some lead is mixed in it seems to work fine.
Robert – A small fella with bushy eyebrows and a funny voice? Yeah, that name sounds familiar.  Did he write a book with his foot or something?
Jim C – If you shot our lot with lead, they’d be delighted. They’d just go aff an flog it.
What a fantastic saying – thank you for my first smile of the day (see, I’m not always whinging!).
Have you tried going online for medicines – you can get them cheaper there, also it is easier to buy medicines abroad – France, for instance – you might want to check it out!
Now Grandad, you could start selling medication from France on the site to subsidise your income…there would be no import duty as the medication would be coming from the EU….
Just keep taking the meds.
Kate – Of course you are not always whinging. Who said you were? And I intend to do a grand old stock-up as soon as I get there.
Bubbles – Grandad’s Patent Remedies! I like the idea. Of course I can carry on selling them from here too?
TT – I would if I could lay my hands on the fucking things.
Grandad
Don’t be so grumpy!
If deBurger had ignored you, you’d have given out even more. He was only trying to be normal 😉
btw His wife is a close relative of mine and you don’t know what you’re missing
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Steph – I’m not being grumpy? We were ignoring each other and I was quite happy about that. What exactly am I missing?  My condolences on your relationship. 🙂
I’ve a load of medications I’m not using at the moment and I’m sure if I can fake any malady well enough to get the whatever medication you need if you need to fill in the odds and ends. I draw the line at estrogen though as my “parts” have been with me for over a half a century and I’m quite happy to keep them just as they are.
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And I still don’t understand why you all don’t just shoot the ones who need shootin’ and start working on something that…well…works. Or at least works better than what you got now. Works for us. 😛
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