A critique of the critic
Some people have a hell of a fucking nerve.
I was sitting here quietly on Sunday, having a few whiskeys and tearing bits out of the papers to throw at Minnie, when I came across this in the Sunday Tribune –
Click to embiggen
Who the hell does he think he is, calling me names?
Headcase? How very fucking dare he!
What’s worse, he is trying to garner sympathy for Herself! Jesu Christi! Is the man insane?
I have been on to my solicitor, and the papers are being served.
I’ll sue him for every penny he has.
Or else I’ll force him to do a guest blog.
I like his style.
Until I read the last line, I thought he didn’t get you—then I laughed. I think he’s worthy of you Grandad!
It’s the inclusion under the heading of ‘The Arts’ that is baffling!
Susan – He got me all right. Right where it hurts. I’m going to ask him to move in with Herself for a while. Then maybe he’ll understand.
Ian – I agree. It should be under Philosophy.
Geez! First radio then TV now in print too. What’s next? You on the internet?
You could always invite him for tea. Just give him a “good” set of directions or even provide an “exact” set of coordinates for his satnav. Of course no sense bothering with return directions.
So this is a review of his review, eh? Is he going to review your blog next, wherein you review his review in a post? His review being, of course, the review of your book? Then you can review his review of your blog wherein you reviewed his review of your book.
I’m getting dizzy.
Tis well for the artists. I shall have to either buy or nakedly steal the ‘Head Rambles’ book now. If its still snowing I’ll buy it. A book is very good but it won’t keep you warm, like.
Is that the full article? If so, it really isn’t a review. I mean he doesn’t say if he thinks your book is good or bad or even if he liked it or not. Or even read it.
Clearly he’s scared of you . . .at least he read the dust jacket
Wish I could get a job like that. Read the dust jacket and get paid.
Jim C – I would have to be very inventive. He probably knows all my tricks by now?
RhodesTer – We are going to keep reviewing each others work in ever decreasing circles until we eventually vanish up our own arses.
Captain [Sir] – One of the stipulations I insisted was included in the contract was that the pook be printed on highly flamable paper.
TT – You should see what he said about some of the other books!! Believe you me, that was a good review. He’s a tough bugger that fella. And judging by his comments, he read it.
Baino – He has a right to be scared. Are you saying my book is dusty?
TT – You can always apply for the job?
I have said book on order with my local library..
* mails this Tom Widger guy some exploding paste and anthrax *
Sam – Tight bastard! Go and buy your own.
TheChrisD – Leave him alone. By his standards, that was a rave review.
At €10,222 I think its a bit steep Grandad. Does it come with a solid gold bookmark or is every full stop a small chip of diamond? Still, I might get the mrs to buy it for my birthday, if she starts saving now she can afford it in 2012 I reckon.
Hoor – Anoter tightwad. For God’s sake, €10,222 isn’t much when you consider what you get for it.
I have enough to do keeping you in line.
My word – he writes like you write – are you sure you don’t have yet another smidgeon of a persona going on?