People of the Year – 2008
We are coming to that time when we are inundated with People of the Year Awards.
I suppose in my capacity as Ireland’s Most Cantankerous Auld Fella, I had better give my list.
As yet, the list is incomplete, but some of the awards have already been allocated.
Here goes:
Sports Personality of the Year:
This award has been held over for yet another year, as we were unable to find any sports people with any personality whatsoever.
Loser of the Year:
This award goes to John McCain, for his unerring ability to select the most damaging running mate possible, and for his ability to consistently lose his head under pressure.
Hypocrite of the Year:
We are proud to award this not to an individual, but to a group – The Green Party. They won this prestigious award for being elected on an anti-Fianna Fail platform and then selling their souls just for the sake of a pension and a bit of power.
Politician of the Year:
This was difficult. In the end, Mary Harney was chosen for her dedication to fucking up the health service. She squeezed in [and it was a tight squeeze] on the basis that she has managed to kill more of the population than any other.
Lardarse of the Year:
See above.
Worst website of the Year:
This goes to TV3. I have never seen it, but they should shut the fuck up about it. Just because they won a Golden Spider! Any fucking eejit can win one of those.
Trier of the Year:
This goes to our old friend Bertie. First he tried to gain sympathy by resigning. Then he tried to gain fame with his antics at the tribunal. Then in a final desperate attempt for sympathy, he threw himself down the stairs. And still they laughed at him…..
Dimwit of the Year:
Again, this is a tie. The winners are Angela Merkel and Nicholas Sarkozy who, despite being leaders of Germany and France, still do not understand the meaning of a simple word – NO.
Blogger of the Year:
This one has me stumped.
Harney fulfils so many of the above [except the sports one obviously] – shouldn’t she receive the big award at the end of the gig – the one everyone stands up for and claps and cries – whatsit, The Hall of Shame?
SHoop – She is a major contender for the Grand Prix all right. She is outstanding in her field [along with the rest of the cows].
No life time achievement award?
Is the last award an invitation for the bribes to begin?
Cash, beer, or tobacco…any preference?
Jim C – I haven’t finished living yet?
Susan – Feel free. Cash is fine. Do you want my Cayman Island number?
Also putting myself forward for blogger of the year. I only started last Tuesday and so far I haven’t said many stupid things. Otherwise I’d like to also like to put myself up for bogger of the year – given that I practically live on one in Kerry. So I should win that with ease. Then when people ask me what it is I’ve won. I will say “bogger of the year” very quickly and they’ll think I’ve said “blogger of the year” and bow down to me, right? Failing all of the above I’d like to put myself up for most annoying comment of the year? Anyone wanna second that. What I’m trying to say is, basically: I WANNA WIN SOMETHING. * gets his coat *
Joe – I like that. Most people start by saying they started blogging last month or last year, but you started last Tuesday. Very specific! What in the name of God drove you to such a daft action?
It is, of course, within my remit to award awards. I have the Golden Crabs at my disposal? Or you could win a Silver Haired Internet Technology [S.H.I.T.] award? But you’ll have to be around a bit longer first. Don’t be greedy. And take that coat off – you look silly.
Hey, would you happen to have a Most Sarcastic Blog Commentator Award?
Like I really need an award….
I think I’ll stick to just being a little blogger – like I said before you don’t normally get awards for that – unless of course you were to make a ‘little blogger of the year’ award – I might get that!!!!
SHoop – You would have to do better than that if you wanted to win it….
Kate – Little Bloggers are fine. I’m a Little Blogger and I got one or two awards. I’m not sure what for though. I think it was a mistake.
“I’m a Little Blogger and I got one or two awards
You… little?
Jesus, in that case, I must be fucking microscopic…
Grandad, Cayman Island number’s grand. (How many grand?)
Joe, what catastrophic timing in your comment. I’ve just been given an award with a meme attached…. yesssss, you’ll dooooo…..
It’s ok I’m here now.
Give me my award and stop stalling.
Shouldn’t the Loser of the Year be the American People for not electing John McCain but instead electing the foole who shall lead us down the path of ruin?
That sounds a whole lot more like it to me.
corrupt liar of the century should go to George “I’m a complete fuck-wit liar’ Bush ……….
Most use of the ‘c’ word in a blog ….. ghost writing in Maxi’s Blog !
H – You only think I’m tall because I was sitting down when you met me. I’m really much taller than that.
Susan – Proof to the old adage – Never wish for something.. you might get it!
Maxi – One SHIT award on its way…. 😉
Brianf – Having elected Dubya two terms in succession, you could hardly expect them to elect a Dubya-clone? Even you couldn’t have been stupid enough! Could you?
Moon – Dubya disqualified himself from that award by reason of insanity. He is a dead cert though for Terrorist of the Year.
Maxi’s blog? Does anyone read that?