Hitting a moving target
Dring.. Dring.. Dring..
Hello?
Hello. May I speak with God please?
Sorry. He’s not available at the moment. This is Saint Peter here. May I be of assistance?
Howya, Pete. It’s Grandad.
Ah, Grandad! I won’t ask how you are because we already know. I know God would love a chat but He’s very busy at the moment.
That’s unusual?
It is a bit. Twenty eight of our main servers crashed earlier while trying to compute Dubya’s sins, misdemeanours, immoralities and other such infractions.
Wow! But I thought you lot were all powerful and all knowing and didn’t need computers?
Normally, yes, but Dubya was beyond even our powers. God is down there at the moment, up to His oxters in cables and disk drives. The language is foul.
I’ll bet. By the way, thanks for the snow this morning. It was very pretty.
You’re more than welcome. We’re arranging a bit of sunshine now as you’ll be going to the village later.
Will I?
Yup. Is there a message I can pass on?
Yes. Could you just tell God that that was a brilliant piece of marksmanship yesterday. A moving target and all..
Ha ha! We all had a great laugh at that one. It made Bertie crap himself, but you won’t hear about that on the news.
Great stuff! It’ll teach him to go by train next time.
I’ll pass on your congratulations anyway. He’ll be delighted.
Not half as delighted as we were.
Third time lucky?
So much for lightning not striking the same place twice!
I guess resigning didn’t change things much as far as the hierarchy’s opinion of him was concerned. Although I wouldn’t begin to pretend that I understood how the Irish government works (hell, I can’t even pronounce the names of the parties or whatever), I had a small smile for you, Bock and the others when I read about his resignation.
So where does that leave you and yours now? Any better off?
Oh…and next time you chat with the “Almighty”, tell him I said hi and that I’m still enjoying his creation. It’s just the people that frustrate the shit out of me.
Two regrets. That bunch of crooks in the White House were not with him. The plane did not go down in flames.
Neighbour – That’s what he gets for ignoring the rules!
Kirk M – We are still stuck with Fianna Fáil [pronounced ‘Feena Foyle’] who are a bunch of crooks. We can only wat and see what Biffo [Bertie’s successor] is like. At least he is reasonably literate.
I’ll mention your name, as long as it doesn’t get me into trouble.
TT – It would have solved a lot of problems all right [and maybe a few future trials?]
What’s that they say? …………. third time lucky?