Comments

Test for citizens? — 18 Comments

  1. It’s traditional for these tests to be completely unanswerable by almost everyone who’s actually a native of the host country, of course 🙂

  2. Sorry Elly. You must have failed the test. You are on the deportation list to the States. Get used to the flag!!

  3. You may physically be in Ireland but you are working for a company who’s headquarters are in the Great Satan’s land far across the sea 🙂

  4. Holy God!!! You’re right Niall. She’s CIA. I just checked with the lads in the Black Van outside.

  5. Why is a mouse when he spins? Is it the more he goes round, the much?

    No. Because the higher he goes, the fewer.

    Sorry, Katherine. It’s the plane for you…

  6. Grandad,

    A stupid friend of mine couldn’t remember the answers to the questions
    at the U.S. Immigration Department, so I told him I would write the answers in his underwear and he’d be all set when they questioned him.

    First Question: Who was the first President of the United States?

    Looking down at the waistband of his shorts,he replied” J.C.Penney.”

    Second question: How many states in the United States?

    Again peeking in his shorts he replied” 34 to 36″

    “What are the colors of the flag?

    Brown and White.

  7. Grandad,

    Certainly he got in!!! If a bunch of Islanders come rowing up to Miami Beach in a refrigerator box, they are immediately waved in and given green cards. The only people we give a really hard time to are,for instance, the Heart and Lung transplant team from the Cardiac Center in Bern, Switzerland who are trying to get to Johns Hopkins Hospital or the scientists from the DNA forensic Crime Solving Unit at Scotland Yard. Those people are of no use to us. We want the clever ones who get by with not one word of English and not one red cent in their pocket. They are our kind of guys!!!!

  8. We want the clever ones who get by with not one word of English and not one red cent in their pocket
    So if I learn Irish and forget English, I can come?

  9. Grandad,

    I don’t know if learning Irish would help you in America.

    Heard on a street corner in New York recently, “Look, man, you’re in America now, speak SPANISH.”

  10. Katherine,
    I have been researching the annals of Irish culture and history and “Why is a mouse when he spins? Is it the more he goes round, the much?” is in fact acceptable. You may stay.

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