When we first got television here we only had one channel.
Stick the old coat hanger in the aerial socket and there it is – HTV in glorious 405 line monochrome, all the way from Wales.
For some reason that was the only signal we could get. BBC was wonky to put it mildly and RTE was virtually non-existent.
Actually, RTE was there but because of the mountains, the signal used to bounce and ricochet around before arriving here so we used to get five or six RTEs all on the one channel which made viewing somewhat messy.
There have been a few small improvements since then. Colour came in and the poor old 405 line service was switched off. Then digital made an appearance in the form of satellite. RTE was still bouncing off the mountains though so we had to watch the satellite version.
I don’t watch much television. Maybe a few hours a week. However the set is switched on most evenings at around six. That’s when I give Herself her evening dose of Prozac and she will then sit happily watching any old shite that the satellite coughs up. It keeps her quiet, but I have to be careful of the advertisements as I haven’t told her about dish washers and some other expensive kitchen toys and she may want one if she sees it on the telly.
They are switching off all the analogue signals next month. It will be digital only thanks to the fucking EU.
I have been trying to get rid of the television for years and this may be my chance. They keep waffling about the changeover and how we have to update or upgrade or whatever. They say that if we see a small warning message on the bottom of the screen that we are going to lose all signals on the 24th of October.
I bought a bottle of Tippex.
It took a steady hand but the warning sign is now etched onto our television so it appears on all channels. I have told Herself that she’ll have to take up reading or knitting or something as on the 24th, the screen will go blank.
Any time some irritating programme appears on screen I look at my little handiwork and count down the days.
“X 24 October”