From the scriptorium

Head Rambles Posted on by 11

I wrote a letter to a friend last night.

Well, it wasn’t exactly a letter as my handwriting has deteriorated to the point where I would be expelled from primary school for sloppiness. Even I can’t read it any more. So I actually wrote an email.

Writing emails comes with its own problems as my keyboard still has a habit of skipping letters for no apparent reason and I have to go back through every sentence and every word replacing all the missing letters.

All that aside, one of the things I mentioned in my missive was that every day was pretty much equal to the previous day and in fact to every other day. At this point the only thing that distinguishes one day from another is whatever is on television that evening.

But the problem there is that there is only an endless stream of crap on every channel every night. The only programme I look forward to is The Apprentice. I don’t know why I like it. Maybe it is the sheer ignorance and lack of education of the contestants? Last year an English contestant didn’t know where Dover was [and was amazed that it was on the south coast] while this year not one contestant knew when the Second World War happened [was it 1916?].

Anyways, The Apprentice isn’t on tonight so I know today isn’t Wednesday. I now use my watch far more to check the day or the week than I do for the time of day. The latter is irrelevant unless I have an appointment somewhere and my phone usually reminds me of an important time.

Even the daily news is slow to change from day to day. These last few days have been dominated here by the return of Lisa Smith – an Irish woman who went off to join ISIS and now wants to return. Personally I am utterly disinterested. If I were pressed for an opinion, I’d probably say that she should be told to stick with her insane buddies back in the desert as it was her choice to go there in the first place. Stupid cunt.

But then no one is interested in my opinions.

Here is today’s news

Head Rambles Posted on by 5

There was a strange “report” during the week.

Irish coverage of climate change low by EU standards, study says

I am having a problem understanding quite what they’re on about here.

Research funded by the Environmental Protection Agency said climate science was generally not contested to any great extent in reporting by Irish media.

Personally I ave found that climate science is never contested by the Irish media. In particular, RTE never misses an opportunity to wheel out George Lee so he can put on his worrying scowl and regale us with portents of doom and gloom. It only takes a puddle at the side of the road and off he goes, rabbiting on about climate catastrophes.

Overall climate change accounted for between 2 per cent and 4 per cent of all news in main national titles.

Well, it would be. News is generally taken up with Brexit, elections, the latest gangland murder or the latest insane law that Shane Ross is proposing. News is news and you can’t be waffling on about the climate all the time. The latest scandal here [apart from gubmint printers] is about childcare facilities. Are we to blame the lack of such facilities on climate change? Indeed, is the gubmint printer fiasco down to Warble Gloaming?

So what exactly are they on about? Should every news item, regardless of topic, contain reference to the climate? Are we supposed to have endless editorials warning us that our time is nearly up?

I’m delighted though that this humble little site gets a passing mention –

It also said the presence of citizen-led and organised scepticism was also notable and it found a high volume of content linking to the US-based Heartland Institute which the report said indicated the capacity of “fake news” and misinformation to infiltrate online platforms.

I don’t remember ever linking to the Heartland Institute so I don’t know where they got that from but I’m grateful to them for the suggestion.

It sounds like a rich source of honesty?

Printing money

Head Rambles Posted on by 7

Someone in our gubmint bought a printer.

The cost was €800, which seems a bit steep considering PCWorld are offering printers for under €25?

Woops!

My mistake.

The cost was €800,000. An easy slip of the pen when it’s someone else’s money?

So they spent €800,000 on a printer, but alas that wasn’t the end of the story.

You see, someone fucked up the measurements and it transpired that having bought the printer, they discovered that the room that was to house it wasn’t big enough. Again, a simple mistake but hey, it’s not their money so who cares? So they put the printer into storage [at a couple of grand a month] while they rebuilt the room at a cost of €236,000. That seems a bit steep as you could damn near build a whole house for that, but once more it isn’t their money.

It now transpires that while they were buying this printer they decided to get a few little accessories to go with it. There was a Plate Making Device, whatever the fuck that is [and a snip at €105,000], a Folding Machine [only €100,000], a Guillotine [€63,500] and a Pile Turner [€37,000].

All in all this printer has now cost the tax payer €1.8 million. And they haven’t even started training people to use the fucking thing which will probably force the overall cost over the €2 million mark.

Two million yoyos for a fucking printer?

Is it any wonder I do my damndest to avoid and evade paying taxes when they just piss that money against the wall?

Excuses, excuses

Head Rambles Posted on by 5

I am rightly pissed off.

This bug wot I thought was just a passing cold has refused to go away. Whatever the fuck it is, it isn’t just a cold. It’s a racking cough, aches all over, no appetite and possibly the worst of all – it turns the brain to mush.

I had intended to try to scribble something yesterday but while the flesh was willing, the spirit was weak. Words formed themselves into sentences that had no meaning whatsoever [which makes a change?]. Coherent thought was a foreign territory.

I did actually go out yesterday which was a major mistake. I went for that eye test thingy and the trip was a nightmare. It was pissing rain and traffic was chaos with traffic jams everywhere. To make matters worse, the test only took a few minutes – I had spent much longer just trying to get into the damned car park. Then to cap it all, they said they want to see me again in just a couple of weeks.

By the time I got home I was way beyond fucked.

I was supposed to go for that cardiac stress test today. If I hadn’t cancelled it I would probably be dead by now. I doubt the body could take any more stress.

Now the Grandkids have arrived for a visit.

That’ll probably finish me altogether…..

Infectious

Head Rambles Posted on by 6

The lurgy continues to run amok in the Manor.

Over the weekend I seemed to spend my time either asleep or trying to sleep. I didn’t have any energy for anything else.

Herself has caught it now and is coughing and spluttering all over the place while feeling very sorry for herself. Naturally I have been according her all the kindness and consideration in the same quantities which I received.

I phoned the hospital today to say I wouldn’t be doing their cardiac stress test. Their computer promptly crashed. There was a long pause while she tried to fix it but she gave up in the end. Either I infected their machine or else it is over stressed?

Time for a doze …