No scrumping
There is a bit of a mystery here at The Manor.
There are three apple trees here on the estate. They have been neglected and left to do their own thing for the last forty or more years. They have never been pruned, the way apple trees are meant to be pruned and as a result they are just a mass of tangled branches.
I know they are apple trees because each year they may, if we’re lucky, produce an apple or two in the autumn.
They were one of the first things I noticed on my return from the delights of HSE hospitality.
I confess my first reaction was “what the fuck?”
What the hell has happened? Trees that normally bear one or two apples are suddenly laden down with fruit.
I can’t think of any reason for this. Nothing has been done to the trees. The weather this summer has been fairly typical – grey skies, little rain and one or two spells when it was actually summery.
I think it’s a little joke on God’s part. He knows I like apples, and he knows I am all but toothless so eating apples is problematic.
If it is a joke, it’s not funny.
I love the English language. It has a word that means to steal, but specifically apples, and only from the tree.
I did a search and came up with the following etymology – late 19th century: from dialect scrump ‘withered apple’.. No mention as to who first used “scrump”!
Could you not make them into scrumpy?
Sell them at an exorbitant price down the village?
Apple sauce? Baked apple with sultanas?
I’m getting a few suggestions here in the Manor. Apple Crumble is mentioned frequently.
I’m drooling already!
I’ve had the same thing with my pear tree’s this year. So much so that branches broke off.
Well, you could always cook up some scumble. It’s made from apples…well, mostly apples.
Apart from that, cider is always a good substitute. Hard cider is even batter.
Nah! Too much hard work, and my tipple is whiskey anyway. Can you make whiskey out of apples?
I don’t think so but Pennings Vodka is made from apples so I guess it comes close? By the way, if you don’t already know,they named a hurricane after me and it’s heading your way. I told you I’d come for a visit one of these days.
Country lore says lots of fruit means a hard winter ahead. The Rowan trees are heavy with berries too.
How they’re supposed to know, but these sayings are often true. I’ll fill the oil tank anyway.
. I’ve had the same thing with my pear tree’s this year. So much so that branches broke off
I’m glad someone else is in the same boat. I was beginning to think there was something really weird going on. A reverse curse?
You Sir are obviously a victim of “reverse scrumping”!