I have not had the best of days…

It started at five this morning. Now Five of the Ante-Meridian is an ungodly hour which should be erased from the planet. It is suited only to lost souls, vampires and people doing shit shift work.

So there I was: wide awake for no fathomable reason and there was no indication that the wokeness would transform into slumber. I read for a while in the hopes that I could fool my brain, but apparently my brain is not so easily fooled. After an hour I gave up. There was no point in torturing myself any further so I got dressed.

Now you would imagine that all these extra hours would give me plenty of time to do all the things I have been putting off. The trouble was, which job would I tackle first? I decided to do the Social Welfare crap that they were demanding off me in order for me to continue to benefit from their pocket money [which isn’t theirs to start with].

For various reasons the old coffers are looking reasonably healthy at the moment. This is worrying in case they think I’m loaded, so I had a brainwave – I ordered a tank of heating oil. Bang! I now have a bank balance worthy of a street beggar. I thought oil was supposed to be coming down in price? They did supply a voucher though which reduced my nearly grand’s worth by eight notes. A whole 0.8% reduction? Big fucking deal.

Things went reasonably well after that. I found various statements and the like and printed them off. They made a grand hefty pile of A4, all stapled together and actually in sequence [my printer spews pages out onto the floor so they glide away like autumn leaves in the wind and get all mixed up].

I decided not to bother with a letter to them as I would be bogged down in references and the like. I decided to just send back the letter they sent me. After all, it all the references and demands so I just ticked the latter and they can do with that.

I decided however that it might be worthwhile taking a copy of their letter so I took a photocopy [my printer does that – fancy?!] but the copy was impossible to read. Fuck! I had run out of ink. But how then did I run off the printing? So I scanned the latter [yes – my printer does that too! And is a Fax machine. Remember them?] and pulled down the result onto my laptop. I opened the file and then sent it back to be printed. That worked perfectly. Loads of ink.

How can a printer be out of ink when photocopying but have loads of ink when printing off a file? It’s the same ink source.

Weird?