The elephant in the room — 8 Comments

  1. Greetings, I just got back from the moon. How are things?

    Been a while since I’ve been around this place, I see things haven’t changed much, what with you grumbling about smoking and whatnot. That’s okay, you grumble in a delightful manner. That’s a skill that few posses.

    I took time off from writing/perusing/interneting/ and being functional. But now we find ourselves in the middle of San Francisco Bay, but on an island, so we’re not getting wet. We have lots of sharks around us though, and seagulls. MY GOD THE SEAGULLS! They make a squawking sound all day long, and there are thousands of them. It’s a cacophony of seagull grumbling.

    The infamous island of Alcatraz is just three miles downstream from us. I know most people don’t care for having a prison in their ‘hood, but ours is a long swim away, and the only prisoners there these days are tourists.

    If Kurt is still around, HEY SAILOR. I retired with the missus to a veteran’s only building on Treasure Island, it’s all new and run by the VA. It has a few problems but not bad at all, considering that when I ventured out the door of our previous digs in the city, I’d get pestered by drug-dealers on every corner who tried to sell me Fentanyl. I declined every time, as I didn’t wish to hasten my inevitable departure from this earthly realm. I’m going to be spending a heck of a long time in the afterlife as it is, so I don’t need to hasten the departure.

    Richard reminded me that you, Kirk, are a submariner vet. So I want to mention the Richard the irony that I was on a sub-hunter; a Knox-class Frigate. Richard would know what that is, I bet. He likely shot coffee out his nose as he snorked while reading that. You see, we would participate in Naval exercises wherein we – the frigate – would go out to a designated area of the deep blue sea and see if we could find one of our own subs. The sub would get all stealthy and elude us, in a big game of ‘cat and mouse.” We were the cat and we often just had to go hungry, because we seldom found the sub. This is why there are no more Knox-class Frigates in the US Navy, but they still have plenty of nuke subs that are VERY GOOD at going all stealthy and being incredibly difficult to find, which is the whole point.

    On the rare occasion we actually located a sub we would fire a dummy “ASROC” missile at it. Kirk would know what that is too, I bet. It’s basically a torpedo on a rocket. It would go way up in the air, and the torpedo would separate from the rocket and splashdown, then go under water and go in circles until it ‘found’ the sub. We missed every time, to the tune of about $100,000.00 US dollars for every ASROC fired. I hear the dummies were a little cheaper because they didn’t have live warheads, but that was above my paygrade.

    I’m back to pounding away on the internetz now, if anyone would like to subscribe to my little corner of it all via my resurrected “Rhodester Chronicles.” I’d be tickled pink if you did, as I’m just getting started with it. Link is below.

    Nice to see you again, Grandad person. Best to you and herself, you are my favorite people in Ireland! But don’t let that go to your head, you are the only people I know in Ireland.


    ~ dAve

    • Bloody hell! Is this turning into a message board or forum or something? That must hold the record for the biggest comment so far?

      Welcome back DW. You got stuck in moderation because you changed your email address.

      And who is this Richard of whom you speak?!

      • The typos, my god. I re-read it, and… the typos, my god. I mean my comment. I read it with fresh eyes and now those eyes have tears of frustration.

        Richard is someone I know but sadly, have never met.

        The email address changes only SEEM frequent to you because you’re ancient and immortal, so it’s just perspective. Why, it was just yesterday that Victoria and Albert visited Ireland, wasn’t it? I heard they couldn’t get any potatoes. And that awful 1st world War sure was something that’s hard to forget when it’s so fresh in one’s memory (I bet). Then those pesky Germans bombed London last week, and… goodness! Look at the time! I need to get to the telly, the yanks are putting a man on the moon!

        The aforementioned comment was unusually long because —

        Yes, I haven’t been around for a few years, and yes, I am now back, and yes, I’m wondering if that was wise.

        But wisdom is overrated, so there you have it.

        • Haha! Don’t worry about typos. They’ll feel quite at home here.

          You got stuck in moderation again because this time you changed your name. Any time you make a change to your name or email address you’ll get chucked into the holding cell.

          • This is due to some obtusive rascalization on my part. Those are words I just made up to sound scientific. But no more changes, I PROMISE. Cross my heart. When you sent me that kind email last week, you used an archaic email address for me that I no longer use for anything, just to reference. I’ve had it for almost 20 years, which in tech terms is like a hundred years or more. It’s covered in moss.

            It’s okay if you still wish to use it for personal correspondence, I get notified if something pops in there.

            But my once and for-all, not gonna change, email is and my username is DW Rhodes because I’m now publishing under that, and need to stick to it.

            I’m going to fill out the little form to send this, using those things, and if it gets stuck one more time it will hopefully be the last time. I’d like for your thoughts to land in my main box as you spew them from now on.

            The only change yet to come is the domain I use for publishing. I just started it, so I have to use the default until after the 1st. When I get my government money on that date I’m purchasing a domain to use forever, so that will change sometime next week.

            Thanks for your kind yet a little crotchety patience, dear sir.

            DW Rhodes, aka dAVe

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