I thought I would have a chat with Mr Spock.

That’s what I call that “artificial intelligence” machine that they have put online. It gives very logical answers and apparently is utterly devoid of humour.

I asked it a couple of straightforward questions such as “what is the meaning of life?”. It came up with a long winded answer which boiled down to the last paragraph –

Ultimately, the meaning of life is a highly personal and subjective matter that each individual must discover and define for themselves based on their own experiences, beliefs, and values.

And I always thought the answer was 42. Spock is too fucking literal and long winded.

I wondered if he was aware of the gender identity thing. I am calling him as a male but suppose he identifies with one of the many other genders. You can’t be too careful in this “woke” world?

How do you identify yourself?

As an AI language model, I don’t have a personal identity like humans. I exist solely as a computer program designed to process natural language and generate responses to questions and prompts.

However, I have been trained on a vast corpus of text and have been designed to provide helpful and informative responses to a wide variety of queries, so please feel free to ask me any questions you have or to request assistance with any problems or issues you are experiencing.

As I said – too literal, long winded and devoid of humour. At least he has added yet another gender to the long list – a computer program.

I tried a different tack.

why is a mouse when he spins?

This confused him. He thought about it for several nanoseconds…

I’m sorry, but the question “why is a mouse when he spins?” does not make sense and seems to be a nonsensical statement. It may be a part of a riddle or a joke, but without additional context or clarification, I am unable to provide a meaningful answer. If you could provide more information or context, I would be happy to try to help you.

The answer is of course “because the higher he goes the fewer” but Spock got it wrong. Again. However he seems to claim to have emotions as he says he would be “happy” to help.

I was getting a bit tired of his literal interpretations of perfectly logical questions so I decided on a different tack.

Calculate the value of pi

Pi (π) is an irrational number, which means it has an infinite number of decimal places and cannot be expressed as a finite decimal or a fraction. It is usually approximated to 3.14159 or simply 3.14.

There are many algorithms and formulas that can be used to calculate pi to a higher degree of accuracy, but even the most advanced methods require significant computational power and time to produce exact values.

As an AI language model, I have the ability to calculate pi to a high degree of accuracy using numerical methods, but providing the exact value of pi is not practical as it has an infinite number of decimal places. However, if you need an approximation of pi to a specific number of decimal places, I can provide that.

Fuck! He got me. Here was I coming up with the glorious vision of Spock going into a meltdown but he foiled me again.

Maybe I’ll just ask him to calculate pi to a billion billion billion places?