I have been musing on the topic of senility.
No, I’m not senile yet, or rather I hope I’m not. I have had quite a few “senior moments” but I put them down to absent mindedness rather than full blown gaga.
I reckon that senility has had a rather bad press over the years. We are led to believe that losing our marbles as we age is a bad thing; something to be dreaded and avoided at all costs [though they don’t actually tell you how to avoid it]. But is it so bad? I would imagine it’s bad enough for the family and friends, having to cope with someone who is totally unpredictable, but is it so bad for the “victim”?
I think it would have distinct advantages. Should I be so labelled, I could get away with murder. Well, maybe not murder but a lot of little indiscretions. I could do pretty much what I liked around the village and they would just shrug and give me pitying glances and maybe the offer of a lift home so I couldn’t cause any more bother.
So why not try a bit of senility just to see how things pan out? I could wander up to someone and ask them if they’re my mother / father / brother / sister or whatever? I could stand in the middle of the coffee shop and ask if anyone has seen my car [I know I left it around here somewhere]. Maybe I could have a satisfying pee into the flowerbed at the bus stop? I’m sure I could come up with a few acts that would cause an aura of pity around me. Once the idea had sunk in that I had finally lost it I would be free to try helping myself to a few items from the shops and forgetting to pay for them. I could wander into the pub, order a pint and then spark up the pipe [though I doubt I could do that more than once]. Just to confuse things I could ask the barman to charge me in real money and not that silly Euro thing.
It could be fun, though it would involve a lot of care to avoid being locked up in a padded room for my own safety.
Of course if it didn’t work out as expected I could just revert back to absent mindedness?
If I remember how, of course.