Breaking wind online
I got a rap on the knuckles yesterday*.
Within minutes of my typing efforts going public, I got a comment from Ed P – “When there are column inches to fill, any old nonsense will do!” and sadly he [or she, or it; one never knows these days, but I’ll stick with the male assumption for now] is absolutely right [but see the bottom of this post! GD]. In my somewhat pathetic defence I will make two points:
The first point is that I generally refer to my outpourings as brainfarts. Now there is a remarkable similarity between a brainfart and the other sort. If you have one of the latter pending it can be difficult to restrain it, even if you’re in a crowded lift or at a funeral at the part where they ask for a minutes silence to reflect on the deceased. If you have to let rip it can be difficult to restrain and inevitably you let go, giving those in your vicinity the full benefit.
Also like its rearmost cousin, one never knows in advance what the content of a brainfart will be. It could be the equivalent of an SBD [the best kind in a crowded lift] or it could be a full blown drawn out blast in three part harmony [which is the worst kind at that silent bit of a funeral] . One tries to restrain oneself but one frequently fails and a bad one slips out. For some reason [my age?] I find urges for both sorts far more common these days, sometimes to the amusement of my readers or sometimes to the amusement of the Grandkids and the annoyance of my neighbours [depending on type].
The second point is a simple one. I refer to the title of this site. In retrospect it’s a damned good title as it gives me free reign to ramble and meander just about anywhere. It might be a short little stroll or it might be a full blown mountain hike. The ramble can just be whatever crosses my mind at the time, and the older I get, the stranger the ramble. Sometimes it’s an idle thought or something that has caught my eye or sometimes it can be an experience or something that annoys me.
I have said before that I have no idea where the name Head Rambles came from. I didn’t copy the idea from anywhere nor did anyone else suggest it.
It just rambled into my head which is somewhat appropriate?
* Erratum: It has been pointed out that I was [possibly] wrong [a rare event] and that Ed P was in fact referring to the article in the Times and not this. My humblest apologies Ed P. In my defence I will say that I haven’t shaken off that damned virus yet and the brain is somewhat scrambled.
I read Mr Edward P’s (no relation) comment as a reference to the so-called journalist who penned the article for the Irish Times.
Having read a bit of the article, the so-called journalist did spot the possibility that remote workers might have become too accustomed to being properly attired only from the waist up. Anyone who was too casual from the edge of the desk down, especially on the hotter days (if they exist in Ireland), might raise an eyebrow or two if commuting by public transport, and the same no matter what mode of transport was used when rolling up at the office.
Hope this helps.
I have noticed that the IT seem to be running out of material of late [and journalistic talent]. One of the headlines today on the front page – “Man caught on his own CCTV with stolen dog after attacking owner”!! Actually the story is quite funny but hardly front page material?
I think there was a case some months ago of some bloke was making a conference thing with some high rankers. He was “appropriately” dressed until he moved at one point and everyone could see he had no trousers on. Luckily he was wearing jocks.
I would concur with DP above. My reading was that Ed P was referring to the digital diarrhea disseminated by the press.
Shit fuck and bugger! I have amended the item above with an appropriate apology
gunker, that was my take as well.
Oh dear! I was, of course, referring to the ‘newspaper’, not your own wise words. Sorry!
My apologies Ed P. That what comes of my having a low opinion of my abilities as a scribbler!
I’ll be clearer in future – looking back and re-reading it, I see there was ambiguity in my facile comment. But it didn’t occur to me you’d think I was aiming at your good self. Apologies again.
Now we have both apologised. Shall we call it quits? 😉
Seeing that the crap you produce every day is so bloody dire why do I go to great lengths to read every word?
Right back to Anna Raccoon. RIP.
Do you know the pictures of yourself and your dog and your car have been buggered off by Google Earth, the new version of which is bloody awful IMVHO. The Pro version is still there but with limited features as I’m sure you know.
By the way great respect to you for producing almost every day. So many bloggers have been left dead on the roadside over the years because of the pressure.
Thank you sincerely for the LOLs you have given me. If you stop there could be demos.
“Do you know the pictures of yourself and your dog and your car have been buggered off by Google Earth” I saw that. What worries me is that you obviously visited GE on a regular basis just to view those images? That is really fucking sad.
Well !!! Really!!! HaHaHa.
That is a fine way to talk to one of your loyal readers.
If visiting GE regularly is fucking sad what does that make visiting your blog every day?
What were you doing visiting Google earth?
If I didn’t know better I would think you are a cantankerous old sod. Oh hang on!
May a lighted match never drop in your beard. Unless you film it.
Visiting this site every day is up there with howling at the moon.
I do have a slight hirsute problem. My hair has grown so long that I am in grave danger of setting fire to myself when lighting my pipe. However I have no intention of filming such an event should it happen. Sorry!
It’s the brainfarts that keep us coming here. The random eclectic mix of home-spun wisdom and pensioner cantankerousness helps the rest of us believe we may actually be normal. More power to the brainfarts.
Excellent summary indeed!
That, coupled with the fact that I have been known to be on the cantankerous side myself.
Why does everyone insist on calling me cantankerous? That hurts.
Uh, perhaps it’s because you’ve referred to yourself as cantankerous (old fart) in the past? Not exactly positive about that so I could be wrong. Anyway, when they refer to you as cantankerous I’ve always assumed that it’s towards your “Grandad” persona rather your actual self. Consider it a back-handed compliment–a good hard swung one but a compliment nonetheless.
And a good fart analogy if I ever read one.
I see another round of apologies in the works.
Shit! What have I said now?
Not a thing grandad. I come here first thing every morning to get my day off to a proper start.
“Why does everyone insist on calling me cantankerous?”
I will refer you to the cover of of your own work of literary genius, HEAD RAMBLES.
There is a banner directly above a rendering some guys head which states “with Ireland’s most cantankerous auld fella”.
That wasn’t me. That was my damned publishers [*cough*] who thought up that line.