Living in a fairytale
I heard some startling news yesterday down in the village.
There is a strong rumour that the village is going to get a Disneyland.
I’m not talking about one of those theme park thingies like they have in Paris: no, I mean they are going to turn the village into Disneyland. All the buildings will be converted and doubtless chaos will ensue.
Apparently Disney are making a film or a sequel to a film [they are finding it difficult to come up with original ideas so nearly everything is a sequel these days] and are taking over the whole village for the summer. Frankly the whole idea fills me with a lump of dread in my stomach. I have had experiences of this phenomenon in the past and generally it usually entails a lot of ducking and diving. Roads get blocked and whole areas are shut off while they fanny about with their lights and cameras. And even when I manage to get into a shop I suddenly find myself shut in while they “do just a quick take” outside.
Yes, our humble little village tends to crop up in a few films. The shopkeepers love it as while it may interrupt trade for a bit, they get their shop fronts repainted twice – once to the film maker’s wishes and once again to return it to its former glory. Once they forgot to repaint the telephone box and for a couple of years we had a red one which confused the hell out of the tourists.
I don’t know what the film is but the story has it that our little national school is going to transform itself into a princess castle which sounds weird. How can a single story building become a castle? They’d be better off transforming my gaff. Now there’s a thought? – let them use The Manor while paying for us to stay in France for a couple of months?
On a lower scale, I wonder how they are doing for extras?
Is there a place for a tall bloke with very long hair [i.e. a Covid Cut] and a grey beard?
I’m not cheap but I’m the real deal.
The way Disney has gone your wee village is going to be very full of weird people.
The Fairy Princess will be a trannie of color. Maybe even a real fairy.
Yup, Disney needs you and the Manor. You as the "wise old lad" that shows up occasionally and the Manor as the quaint old place you live in. Something like that anyway. Could be your chance?
I certainly missed out on the Gandalf one?