I am delighted to see that all our current problems are solved.
Obviously the Virus is beaten, the homeless crisis is solved, Brexit is a mere memory and it’s time for our politicians to turn their attention to the really important problems that blight our daily lives.
This somehow conjures up images of great steaming piles of ordure on every corner. Or maybe she is complaining about horses dropping their potatoes everywhere? Has someone driven a herd of cattle through her village?
No. Apparently her overriding concern is dog shit.
Now I live near enough to an Irish village [which presumably comes under the umbrella of her rant] and I honestly can’t say I have noticed any dog shit anywhere.
We have our dogs all right. The grocery shop has two little yappers that yell at me out their windows when I pass. The is the hotel’s aged and overweight Labrador who wanders around greeting people with indifference. There is the little fucker who ambushes me by suddenly going into attack mode when I pass his garden. There is the Irish Wolfhound who regally pads his way through the village on a regular basis. Then there are all the dogs that people have on leads. There are dogs everywhere. But little or no sign of dog shit.
Maybe the dogs in the village have a different diet? I have never seen anyone pick up a turd. I have never seen a turd bag hanging from a bush which is apparently a decorative feature in our friend’s area. If Penny decides to have a dump [which she normally reserves for my front driveway] I just casually kick it into the gutter to be flushed by the next rain.
Doherty also said she was in shock to hear that there were 800,000 dogs in the country but just 217,000 dog licences.
In shock? The poor woman is badly in need of a Valium or five. God help her if she ever comes up against something really shocking.
I confess I am a little surprised myself. 217,000 dog licences? I don’t think I have ever seen one of those, yet a whopping 217,000 apparently have. What are the licences for? Does the gubmint contribute towards feeding and caring for my dog? Does a gubmint official turn up each day to bring Penny for a walk? Did I get a rebate for the hundreds I shelled out recently when Penny got very ill? Actually I did but that was from insurance that I pay for. What exactly do I get for buying the dog licence? Nothing! Sweet fuck all. I shell out money and just get a worthless piece of paper in return. Do they think I’m mad?
Frankly Doherty is a bit of a hypocrite. There is indeed massive quantities of shite in this country and nearly all of it spoken by politicians.
Get rid of them and our lives would be a lot cleaner.