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The Awakening

Head Rambles Posted on by

What the hell has happened to me?

There was a time when I was the scourge of the Interweb. Politicians and others quaked in their boots for fear that they would come to my attention and get a lashing from my acerbic wit. Shelves groaned under the weight of all my trophies and awards.. Publishers fought amongst themselves to sign me up. I was king of my domain.

Then I look at yesterdays scribble and I cringe. Books that I’m reading? Fuck me but that’s the kind of crap I used to lambaste others for writing. Tedious, boring, uninteresting shite. Next thing I’ll be putting up fashion tips and how to apply make-up.

I worry. Am I loosing my marbles? Is this a sign of encroaching dementia? Am I becoming that boring old fart who traps people in the pub with his endless tales of tedious nonsense?

Where is the Grandad of yesteryear?

 

Comments

The Awakening — 11 Comments

  1. Don't worry  – I still like you.  Whatever you write, your irrepressible personality always shines through.

  3. Don't worry.  All oldies like us have a problem  with words, but still can not put them together as well a you.  Keep going at least for time to come.  

    BD

  4. Oh dear. This could prove terminal , perhaps you should apply to Bake Off once you start posting recipes on here for shortbread.  

  7. Comes from being cooped up in the manor all this time. No trips to the village (unless it's prescriptions and the like), no coffee shop talk or whether Penny got her handful of chicken, no trips to your doc, setting booby traps for unsolicited callers, I mean–you even have a decent neighbor for once. And you can only bitch about the government for so long before it gets tiring. No daily excitement to fire the imagination and creativity suffers.

    Besides, this so-called (covid-19) global "disaster" wasn't supposed to happen until you and I were long dead. It's what I call ironic.

    By the way, since I haven't been able to keep up with events here, probably due to a severe case of covid-19 apathy…

    …did you ever get your groceries?

    • I think you have managed to eloquently sum up the entire problem.  I have become boring.

      did you ever get your groceries?  No.  Not yet. But it is only a few weeks since I put in the order.

      • "I have become boring."

        No, your life has become boring and that's an entirely different thing. If this covid-19 thing hadn't ever occurred you'd still be rolling along cantankerous as ever. In other words, it's not your fault.

        Perhaps you could make stuff up?

  8. I’ve awakens to my inner scofflaw. I’ve always been one to ignore ridiculous laws, but with a flair for ducking the cops. Now it’s more blatant. The cops here, aside from arresting someone for playing T-ball with their kids, are ignoring drivers with expired registrations/inspections and in many cases, speeding. I’ve got 2 out of 3 going. I feel like a teenager again, zipping along at 90mph on the freeway, zero fucks given. The cops are afraid of the “rona”, but I’m not. Come get me!

  9. I am reminded of the cricket commentary on BBC Radio 4.

    Cricket is normally a boring sport, specially on radio. What made it bearable was the commentary provided by two masters of the mundane. 

    When nothing  much was happening on the field of play, often, Johnners and Aggers would ramble on about whatever caught their eye, ear or imagination.

    Describing it makes it sound daft, but listening to it was balm. Watching a fire in a hearth, birds, fishing, a baby playing. Why are they enjoyable.

    Sir, your ramblings are the same. Ramble on.

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